Messages From Malawi

Nothing New in the New Year

2012-01-13T02:24:00.000-08:00

Ironic, isn’t it? How we get so excited about a new year, when really each day passes so much like the one before it. Same here in Malawi. We’re all doing well, but everything is about the same. Omara is talking more and more, running, getting into everything, and looks quite strange with 6 teeth on the top and 2 on the bottom. She’s learned the power of biting, though, and keeps her siblings in line. No more stealing toys from the baby! Isaac has days of going all day using the potty and being so proud of himself, and I think we’re finally getting somewhere. And then the next day… nothing but more laundry I have to fit in between power outages. I haven’t figured out what makes the difference. But no matter, he’s happy, and always muddy, and talking up a storm that is mostly understandable now. We praise God for that—it’s been a long time coming. Ethan and Anya are pretty much the same as always—surely growing up but so gradually that some days it’s hard to see the progress. They’ve done well over this 4-week holiday, playing together and not getting too bored. Of course it has helped that we had my mom bring out ipods for them for Christmas! The cost of an ipod touch? More than I expected. The value of watching the kids practice math facts and enjoy it? Priceless!

Chad had a good break as well, though he couldn’t visit any students outside of Lilongwe as he had planned to do, because the fuel shortage isn’t letting up. In some ways it was nice to have an excuse to just relax and recuperate. But it is also frustrating to feel like we’re here, putting up with the hardships of life in Africa and not able to do the jobs that brought us here in the first place. He wrote text-booklets for his classes, then the day before class started he looked at the schedule again and realized he had prepared for the wrong classes and frantically (and angrily, I might add) put something else together. Then he went to class, and realized we had been sent the wrong schedule and the first information was right after all. At least the MAJORITY of work was spent on the right things, but I’m sure he lost a few weeks of life over that one!

We’ve been keeping an eye on things here in Malawi, as the tension seems to be building. Prices rise every week, and apparently they doubled last night. We pay our nanny a premium salary of 15,000 Kwacha/mo, and the cost of transportation for her to get here just went from 6,000 to 12,000 per month. We really love her, but I can’t imagine she’ll continue to feel like that’s worth it, and we can’t afford to raise her any more. There were riots and looting of Chinese shops last week, and there are rumors of a city-wide strike and potential riots “sometime soon.” Many are talking of the need to ‘kick out’ the Indian and Chinese business men who own all the shops (and make all the money). Right now there’s no immediate threat to us, and life continues to limp along with relative normalcy. But please do pray for the country. We’re finding it challenging to meet the rising costs, and yet it’s a million-times worse for the people, who have seen maize (their staple food) more than double in the last 2 months. Rent has gone 50-100%, all the while salaries have remained the same. Something will have to change, or people will indeed take to the streets, because it will not be possible to feed themselves any longer.

A look at some numbers

2011-12-23T22:08:00.000-08:00

300: Number of poopy diapers we’ve changed in the last 15 weeks, which averages out to 20 per week, or 2.8 per day. How do I know this? In South Africa I bought 3 packs of 100 small, scented “diaper bags” to throw away the toxic waste that seems so unending and to keep our bathroom from being dangerous to our health. They lasted just over 3 months. We’ve really got to get Isaac potty-trained!!!

1000: Number of kilometers that Chad has run in the past 12 months. That man can keep a new-years’ resolution! I tease him that even his hobbies have to be goal-oriented, but I guess it works for him. When he started running again in January, he decided to try for “a million meters” for the year, and this morning he got his final 6k. The only problem? Next year I just know he’ll have to beat his record.

249: Number of species of bird Chad has seen since July. One more to go for him to meet his goal for the year. Did I mention anything about his hobbies being goal-oriented? Malawi has a lot of challenges, but the bird-life here is quite remarkable. And as much as I roll my eyes when he pulls out his book and wants to show me the “amazing plumage” of some latest find, I actually do love the way it’s made his love of nature accessible here in the city, since there’s no petrol to go to any of the game parks or the lake anymore. And it’s teaching the kids to be observant and to love nature, too. He and Anya followed a Harrier Hawk through the forest for 20 minutes last week, and she’s still talking about it. And I swear I hear Omara calling all animals “birds!”

32: Number of months (2 yrs 8 mo) we have been in Malawi. I confess there are times when I feel I’ve felt every one of those months, but most of the time has been remarkably smooth. We miss the US conveniences, and we sometimes day-dream about driving on smooth roads at 70 mph, or grocery shopping at 2am just because we can, or driving up to a fuel station and getting in and out in under 10 minutes. But really, we can’t complain. God continues to meet every challenge with a blessing.

1: Number of hours our last fill-up took at the gas station. Chad was over-the-moon ecstatic at how God had blessed us once again with “easy access” to fuel. We regularly talk to people who have sat in lines for up to 16 hours, sometimes even longer! We’ve clocked the lines at over a kilometer long on a regular basis, all over town. It makes me fascinated at how one’s definition of a blessing need to change based on circumstances. The challenge, I think, is in us recalibrating our “dictionary” properly! But this time, we succeeded in recognizing the blessing for what it was. You gotta celebrate the small victories, because sometimes that’s all there is!

And the holidays are upon us, I guess

2011-12-06T23:50:00.000-08:00

I spent last Friday night at an out-door Carol-Sing picnic in the heat of the African evening. It was wonderful to sing Christmas carols in the moonlight while cooling down after a hot day…everyone should get to experience a steamy holiday season!! And with no TV commercials, no radio jingles, and no malls, I’m feeling quite unstressed about the upcoming season. Of course, it didn’t even occur to me to start the advent calendar until the kids pointed out that we’re already 7 days late. We’ll get Christmas stuff out this weekend—what’s a few more days when it seems so out of place!?!

Chad finished his term last Friday, not a day too soon. It was an exhausting term with teaching 4 classes. We tried to celebrate with friends at a new hamburger joint, but it didn’t go so well. Isaac was crawling over the booth walls to interfere with other people’s fancy dates, they gave the kids balloons and within minutes I was getting pummeled by all 4 of them while trying to carry on a conversation with the other adults, then Isaac decided to run away towards the road, and then Anya suddenly and without warning got sick to her stomach and vomited. I ended up taking Anya and Omara home before the food arrived, while Chad stayed and tried to keep the boys in their seats long enough to enjoy the American-style burgers. Next time I think we’ll celebrate WITHOUT the kids!!!

The kids get out on the 16th, which feels late. Anya has been echoing my feelings exactly, saying frequently, “Mom, I’m just worn out and I need a break!” I don’t have the heart to tell her it only gets worse. Ethan continues to have great days at school and then some that are not so great. I think he’ll do well with a break as well. The new kid in his class I had such high hopes for friend-potential has been having a rough time adjusting to Africa. I think we underestimate how hard it is on these kids when we uproot them from everything normal and plop them down in a place like Malawi where everything is different and they have to start over with no friends and no extended family. Anyway, this boy isn’t in a place where he wants new friends, so that’s not working out very well. Isaac is also hit-or-miss with his advances. Some days he’ll go 24-hrs without an accident, and then the next day he’ll fill his underwear 3 times before lunch. And that’s gross! I’m trying to stay calm and non-aggressive with it all, and I think it’ll pay off in the long run. I PROBABLY won’t have to send him to KG in diapers! Omara is walking everywhere, and has taken after her brother already in her love of the outdoors and of mud/dirt. She cries whenever she has to come inside. These African-born kids of mine won’t know what to do with a cold winter when we’re home on furlough!

Other things in life are starting to ease a little. Beef is back, and that's good because you can only eat so much chicken! And wonder-of-wonders, I saw Sprite and Coke at the store yesterday. It's been over 4 months since those were easily available. The black-market on Coke was getting quite impressive, I heard! Of course, the short relief from gas shortages seems to be up--lines are forming again, and public transportation is starting to shut down again. I guess you can't win it all!!

The Rest of the Family

2011-11-10T23:16:00.000-08:00

I gave you all an update on Omara last week, but didn't talk about the rest of us much. Since the internet is actually working and the power is on, I thought I'd let you know how we all are.

Anya is thriving, as always, though she has started showing increased impatience with the numerous petty rules their school has. Maybe it's our "baggage" from having attended a petty-rule boarding school ourselves, but Chad and I find it hard to be supportive of dumb rules, too. Especially in a country where basic living is difficult--mandatory meetings 2 hours after school gets out when it's taking 14 hours of waiting in line to get fuel???? Come on!!!! Anyway, we've figured out how to define the teeny-bopper years. It's the stage in which girls have teen-aged attitudes about childish things. Case in point? She said after watching Alvin and the Chipmunks 2, voice dripping with too-coolness, hand on the hip and hair flipped back, "I thought the Chipmunks were good, but the Chipettes just ROCK!"

Ethan continues to do well with his shots and his report card showed straight A's in academics and "needs improvement" on listening, following directions, working independently, etc. No surprise there! He's had some ongoing friend issues too--best friends one day, "everyone hates me" the next, so he could use some prayer on that front. He adores his teacher and writes her love-notes every afternoon (!) but that doesn't translate into loving homework! But we are seeing improvement with writing and spelling, and slow improvement with reading.

Isaac is talking much more, though it's still difficult to understand him. To be specific, he has "initial consonant deletion." Aunt Betty continues to work with him and he LOVES "going to school" at her house each day! We're encouraged by his progress, and we also think it's a good sign that he's finally frustrated when we can't understand him-before it was like he really didn't care because he didn't have much to say anyway. Potty training has suddenly taken off, though we're now in the horrible stage of doing well in big-boy undies all day until he has a BM, and then I'm stuck washing them out!!!! Enough said, I'm sure.

The shortages here in Malawi continue to plague us. The petty things are no soft-drinks (can't import the carbonation) or beef (disease outbreak at the farm). More difficult are the electricity (off 4-10 hours per day, we never know when or for how long. Sometimes it's on and off 6 times in one day! It makes computer work, laundry and ironing a nightmare! And all the milk in town is sour!) and fuel. I can't even describe the mayhem surrounding fuel issues! We're conserving fuel in every way we can, so Chad is riding his bike to and from the Seminary each day (on top of running 30km per week!) and I'm walking the 3km to the clinic 3 days a week. I arrive hot and sweaty, and I don't like that, but at least it's got me out in the sun, exercising. I bent down to pick up Omara yesterday and my pants button literally popped off and went flying. Totally not cool!!! The last of the baby weight is stubborn this time, and I've been too exhausted by life to do much about it.

So we're trying to look on the bright side of it all, but we would appreciate prayers that we don't let it wear us down too much. I've been trying hard to be calm and practical about doing what we can and not stressing over what we can't. But judging by my level of fatigue by 8pm every night, I'd say it's getting to me more than I would like to admit.

Baby's growing up

2011-11-07T06:33:00.000-08:00

I now have a 1 year-old! Funny—1 seemed a lot older on my first child than my fourth. Omara is still very much a baby in some ways. I look forward to no diapers, to her feeding herself, getting herself dressed, not needing to be held all day long. But then again, we’re headed in the right direction! She’s chattering non-stop. Not much is coherent, but at this rate she’ll be talking before we can understand Isaac! She’s taken 4 steps, though she still prefers the crawl. And she’s just as cute as she ca n be.

It’s been such an exhausting last month, I spent too many days last week thinking how I should plan a party and then knowing that I didn’t have the energy for it, and then feeling like a terrible mom as I wondered how easy it would be to fake some pictures so she wouldn’t know she never got a 1-year party! But Friday morning a co-worker texted us all that she felt like having a get-together at their house “just for the fun of it.” I know it was God, protecting my heart from more guilt and Omara from a faked scrapbook page!!! I whipped up a chocolate fudge cake (that was delicious, by the way!) and made her a Smash cake. See, that’s another thing I’ve learned from my Southern Southern Baptist friends. A 1-year old needs a smash cake, not just a slice of the regular cake like us Northerners do! We got to sing to her and watch her, indeed, smash her cake and cover herself from head to foot in chocolate fudge frosting, white cream filling, with bits of crumbs stuck everywhere. It was adorable, and the photos are great. I’ll try to attach one as soon as I can. Then she put on the real show, flirting with Uncle Jeff, talking to us all, laughing at herself, and holding up 1 finger as if announcing to anyone who might have missed it that she is now, in fact, 1 year old.

My baby is slowly growing up, but I don’t have any of that sad nostalgia over it. I love my kids, don’t get me wrong. I love them fiercely, I am just excited that they’re growing up. The “baby stage” is sweet, and I love the cuddles, but with each kid it gets harder, and I’ve found 4 to have pushed me to my max. Now I’m ready to play board games without having to fish the Sorry pieces out of someone’s mouth. Ready to go on a walk without carrying one of them. Ready to hang out with them instead of just taking care of everyone. I keep hearing that it’ll be here before I know it and then I’ll miss them being younger. Right now, up to my elbows in dirty diapers and crying babies who can’t talk, I say “Bring it on!”

1 Day to Go!

2011-10-31T02:07:00.000-07:00

I can't believe Chad will be home tomorrow! All in all, it's gone better than I expected it would. Yesterday the kids woke up as holy terrors, consistent with it being a Sunday! I had true fear and trembling about taking them all to church, but I had committed in my spirit that I needed to show them how important church is, so off we went. And after a pep-talk in the parking lot, they were amazing during the whole service!!! All 4 of them! Thank you, LORD! I find few things more frustrating than getting us all ready for church and then missing out on the whole service because of bad behavior, so they really blessed me by shaping up. Of course, that's not to say there weren't hard moments in there...top of the list would be Isaac climbing off the potty while I answered the gate and peeing on my bed instead, or maybe the incident where Isaac tried to steal Ethan's lunch, Ethan wouldn't let him, so Ethan ended up with a fork stuck in his scalp, hanging down between his eyes. Really, if it weren't so horrible it would have been quite funny. I resisted the urge to take a photo and instead removed said fork from his forehead and sent Isaac to time-out! In the midst of the chaos, Omara got 2 new teeth, said her first word (hi or bye, we're not sure...or maybe both??) accompanied by the cutest beauty-queen pageant wave, and took 2 steps! Ethan had a great play-date with a new friend in his class. Anya, our flexible social butterfly, had playdates all week, and does well no matter what else is going on!

That's not to say I won't be utterly glad when Chad steps off that plane tomorrow! He mentioned that his room-mate was horribly ill all week...pray with me that he hasn't caught anything. I think I really might just loose my marbles if he comes home sick!

Flying Solo in Lilongwe

2011-10-24T02:54:00.000-07:00

Chad is off to South Africa for a meeting and then dermatology appointment. Because of the flight limitations, it's going to be a whopping 12 days of me and the 4 kids flying solo! I admit, I cried all the way home from the airport. I wanted to suggest that the IMB should send all of us wives to a spa to recover from this meeting, but since there's hardly enough money to pay for fuel to do our jobs, I doubt that will happen! I comforted myself to sleep last night by planning a get-away to a bed-and-breakfast for just me once he gets back. In a 1600 sq. foot house with no sound-proofing, it's the only way I'll ever get to sleep past 5:30am for YEARS to come!

Yesterday I kept myself busy by chasing children from one mess to another. In my 16-hr day, I pulled Omara away from playing in the toilet, confiscated a machete from Isaac, changed 4 poopy diapers, taught Isaac the lesson that "It's not ok to sit on your sister's head," found Ethan after he ran away from home (because his sister won their bike-vs-scooter race!), interrupted a beating Ethan was about to get with a golf-club at the hands of his frustrated brother before any damage was inflicted, helped 4 children take 5 baths, rescued every one of our bowls that Isaac took outside and filled with mud before any were chewed up by the dogs, reorganized 4 drawers of linens and clothes after Omara unpacked them, and cooked dinner with a crying child attached to each leg. You might think I must have been laying on the couch eating bonbons and ignoring everything else to have that much going on, but no. In fact, I'm convinced it's a conspiracy, with the kids trying to see just how long my rope is before I fall off the sanity-wagon!

When it was all over and I finally got all 4 asleep, I stood over their beds in amazement that such precious, beautiful children can inflict such chaos! Then I collapsed in bed myself, so that I could get up and do it all again. So far today, it's noon and there have only been 2 poops and 1 bath necessary, so things are looking up!

Ethan's South Africa trip update

2011-09-23T02:04:00.000-07:00

We mentioned some things in our prayer letter, but let me take a moment to update the rest of you on Ethan's follow up with the endocrinologist. As background info, our kids are all small, but they've all stayed true to their growth patterns. They usually hover between the 3rd-20th percentiles. No problem. Except suddenly, Ethan almost completely stopped growing between Dec 2008 and now, making him fall from the 20th to well below the 3rd. We were seen by a pediatric endocrinologist in July of last year, and it was determined that his Growth Hormone (GH) levels were normal, so we waited and prayed.

Despite reassuring growth between last July and November, Ethan's growth velocity (cm/month)for the year as whole was slow enough to have him drop further off the growth chart. After much discussion, the endocrinologist finally convinced me that it's time to start GH treatment. I was really resistant, because it's such a big step. It's expensive, we have to travel to South Africa every 6 months to get the supply of meds, it's only available as an injection... But then I got this mental picture of Ethan in college at 110cm tall, trying to get a date! I know it's a bit drastic. But I have had to accept that, as much as I hate taking drugs, sometimes they are needed. And would it be fair to potentially "short-change" Ethan because of my desire to avoid a temporary discomfort??? So, we'll do a 6-month trial to make sure he responds to it. Assuming he does, we'll continue it for a year or so, and then try taking him off of it. If his own growth hormone starts functioning again, we're home free. If not, he'll have to go back on GH, probably until puberty! While there is no clear reason WHY he's stopped growing, it may be that his naturally produced hormones are not active for some reason.

Whatever the reason, it means daily sub-Q injections for the next year. I was terrified about adding that into the mix of homework and being nice to siblings. Could I handle one more daily fight??? But Ethan has been an amazing trooper! He cried in fear for 5 minutes the first time, but by the 3rd day he was doing it himself! He often reminds me that he needs his shot, and we haven't had a single fight over it. In fact, he proudly announced to his whole class that his mom started stabbing him in the leg each night, and now he's allowed to stab himself. That got me pull-aside by his teacher, as you can imagine. But I'll take bragging over screaming any day!

The benefit of the doubt

2011-09-19T03:09:00.001-07:00

A good friend has impacted our lives forever. We won’t mention any names (Luke Safford!!!) but he introduced my husband to bird-watching. Things will never be the same. Case in point? He’s now documented 150+ species since he started 2 months ago. Granted, this is Malawi, one of the best bird-watching places in the region. But still, I assure you 150 species represents many an hour spent with binoculars out in the fields, or hunched over the “Birds of Sub-Saharan Africa” book which I bought him in a moment of weakness! To his credit, he usually takes at least 1 kid out with him. He’s bound and determined to turn them into bird-watchers too, though it’s yet to take.

But this is all just in introduction. See, the real story is that we took a volunteer team to Zambia last month so that they could safari in the game park there. We camped (in tents) at a wonderful site, despite a friend questioning the wisdom of camping near a game preserve in Africa (something about lions and leopards, I don’t know). Anyway, we camped. And the first day, the kids wanted to go to the pool so we all headed out. Only I forgot our towels in the tent, so Chad offered to go back and bring them to us. 45 minutes later, the kids’ lips were blue and I was juggling 4 crying kids with no towels, mentally cursing my no-good-bird-watching husband who had no doubt been distracted by a must-see species! I managed to get all 4 kids back to the campgrounds, ready to give Chad a piece of my mind. “What were you doing?” I demanded, fully expecting his familiar sheepish grin.

He knows me well, and he knew exactly what I thought he had been doing. So I detected a small bit of pleasure in his voice as he told me his story. A large, bull elephant had come through camp and decided it didn’t like him much. He ran and hid behind the car, and then had to circle the car back and forth to avoid it as it came looking for him. As he tired of this game, he flapped a towel at the elephant’s general direction, “like a matador with a bull” (he later admitted it might not have been the wisest move!) and the elephant turned to run away. But his foot caught on the tent stake, and that was the straw that broke the elephant’s back. He backed up and trampled the tent into smithereens before finally running away! Thanks be to God, he missed the luggage and no one was IN the now-flat tent! But Chad had to repair it as best he could, and move us under a shelter to reduce the risk of a repeat trampling. And all the while, I was irritated at him for deserting his family to a cold swimming pool!

So remember this, the next time you are tempted to assume the worst of your husband. He could be playing hide-and-seek with an angry elephant. Or, then again, he could be bird-watching!!! It's really a 50-50, isn't it?

Back to routine

2011-09-13T02:11:00.001-07:00

The kids are back in school and we’ve all adjusted pretty well. Ethan adores his new teacher, and she has been very sweet and patient with his distractibility. So far so good for grade 1! Now that doesn’t mean homework is any easier—how can a child take over an hour to write out 8 spelling words????

Anya is in grade 4, and it’s been a harder adjustment. I’m not sure why—her teacher is great and she’s with most of her friends again. Her first day of class she came home dancing because the teacher doesn’t assign homework, they just have to finish what they didn’t finish in class. Despite her joy, I had a sense of impending doom. And I was right…she has homework every day, because she never finishes anything during class! When I tried to talk to her about it, she said with pure disgust, “I know mom—it’s teaching me ‘responsibility!’” (insert teeny-bopper attitude here). She has projects to work on over weeks, and she waits until the night before. She has tests to study for, and she can’t stand the thought of doing something as vague as ‘studying’. And I’m a bit lost, wondering how much to be involved beyond gentle reminders, and how much to let her struggle in order to teach her that dreaded ‘responsibility!’

Chad has 3 more weeks before classes start for him, so he’s busy getting lectures prepared between power-outages. I’m back at the clinic my usual 3 mornings a week. There’s no way to answer how “that’s going.” Some days it goes great. Other days I want to run away and never look back, because I just don’t want to know what some people live with as their reality.

Today we admitted a baby with pneumonia…6 weeks old and 3.3 pounds. It’s beyond unsettling to see a baby look so perfectly formed (fingernails, eye lashes, etc) and so unnaturally small. Literally just skin and bones, with big serious eyes that seem to stare into my soul and ask why some have to fight so hard just to survive. She’s had more pain and suffering in her 6 weeks than many will have in a lifetime. I want to scoop her up and take her home, and yet there are thousands more like her here in Malawi, and hundreds of other countries with their own thousands of suffering children. I truly can not think about it too long, or I get overwhelmed with depression and angst! So we prayed for her, and we all gave her lots of snuggles and hugs, and we go back to work, because later today or tomorrow there will be another one, and it won’t do anyone any good if we’re curled up in the fetal position crying, will it?

Ponderings of an American far from home

2011-09-01T01:56:00.000-07:00

Our summer full of volunteers is over now, and we're slowing getting back into 'normal' routine. The first couple meals I cooked for just our family seemed ridiculously small, but we've adjusted. But seeing all our friends and visiting with so many Americans has made me realize I've forgotten some things. Nothing major, just small stuff that made me realize I've been away for kind of a long time.
1. Americans smell really good! Our volunteers were tough-cookies, with no prissiness in any of them. Yet even these down-to-earth ladies who were willing and able to walk for miles in dirt and sit on mud hut floors and eat goodness-knows-what in the villages would come in from showering and smell like heaven! It made me realize that smells are very culture-bound. Now, I realized the minute I stepped off the plane that body odor is most definitely viewed differently by different cultures! But, for example, the dish soap we can get is scented..."smells ammonia fresh" the label boasts. Ok, so I guess that's ok for a cleaning agent, though I would not call ammonia a 'fresh scent.' Then there's the shower gel. It boasts it is "aromatherapy scented to reduce stress" which sounds promising. Only it's scented with marjoram. As in the Italian spice. Who knew smelling like Ragu could be stress-relieving???
2. American toilet paper is unearthly soft! One team brought some as packing filler. I would have never dreamed of asking someone to bring us TP, and I would have never thought of myself as caring that much. But it's , soft. I mean, compared to what we have here... it's pretty awesome! Now, I won't go asking people to send it out to us at $50/box for shipping, I promise. But just let me enjoy having it while it lasts.
3. Hanging out with Americans isn't exhausting, even for this introvert! I really enjoy visiting with Malawians, but I'm always surprised at how much it takes out of me. With Americans, I actually understand what they mean with almost every word they speak. Now I'm not talking about accents. Accents don't usually throw me anymore. It's the meaning I'm talking about--the deep, true meaning that's hidden behind all the confusing words that mean different things to different people, behind all the unspoken expectations. It was so refreshing and actually relaxing to not have to try and de-code anything. The speakers just meant exactly what I thought I heard! AMAZING!
4. We have a pretty exciting, crazy life here in Malawi. I don't know why it took having volunteers to more fully realize this, but there was something about watching their awe and wonderment over the things we take for granted. Things my kids will grow up thinking is totally normal are mind-blowing for someone who has not been out of the US. One friend was completely in love with the excitement of "getting to" eat in the dark when the power would go off. I could use a little better attitude at getting to share candle-lit dinners with my family several times a week! And the game park safaris? Wow!! So we don't have waterparks or roller-coasters, but who can complain about lions guarding a buffalo kill or leopards walking beside your car???? Even with marjoram-scented shower gel, rough toilet paper, and lots of little inconviences of life, I'd say we're pretty lucky!

African roadtrip

2011-08-05T05:23:00.000-07:00

4 adults and 4 kids under 10 in a 7-seater glorified minivan, along 3300+ kilometers of African roads. Dream or nightmare? Believe it or not, it was wonderful!

We wondered if we would ever leave Lilongwe at first. The Zambian embassy was closed the 2 days before we were set to leave, so we had to get our visas that morning. I almost cried when their photocopier was "out of toner" we had to drive around town to find a place to copy our passports for them! Meanwhile, Chad was trying to get a letter from InterPol saying we hadn't stolen the car, and the police station's printer ran out of ink. Really--you can't make stuff like this up! But we finally made it out, and boy was it worth it!

We saw lions with a fresh kill, elephants from just meters away, zebra and giraffe and hyena in South Luangwa Park, Zambia. We went to a mall and had milkshakes in Lusaka (ok, not the absolute highlight of the trip, but still!) We were struck dumb by the beauty and magnitude of Victoria Falls in Zambia and Zimbabwe. We got stuck in the Kalahari-like sands of Chobe Park, Botswana. We floated the Zambezi river in dug-out canoes at sunset. We caught fish with teeth on Lake Kariba with good friends. There are not words to describe what an awesome time we had. No break-downs. No border problems. We discovered that gas stations in other countries actually have gas without 4-hr lines. And the kids did great on the several 9-hour days of driving and it really was a trip of a lifetime. Literally. I'm not keen on doing it again until my tailbone heals and my spine is realigned!

We're still here!

2011-07-20T05:24:00.000-07:00

Where to begin!?!?! It’s been so long since I wrote, and so much has happened! We’ve been super-busy, and super-happy with all that’s on our plates this summer.

Volunteers from Missouri came out in June. One woman, Annie, is a PE teacher, so we held sports camps for 4 days each week for 2 weeks, using 2 local churches to help with organization and management. Ok, so there wasn’t much organization OR management, but there were lots of kids! Annie did a great job going with the flow, corralling kids as much as possible, and letting the games morph into something neither we nor they had ever seen before. But they loved it! She taught them ultimate Frisbee, and several different tag games, and of course, there were lots of soccer games. The younger kids enjoyed a version of “Duck, duck, goose”---it ended up being more appropriately titled, “tap, tap, whack” since the signal to give chase was really more of a hearty slap to the head! We also ran into a translation issue...the word for ‘to touch’ also means ‘to grab’ and ‘to hold.’ That’s never been much of a problem before, but tag certainly looked different as each child decided to interpret that word as they saw fit! Overall, it was a roaring success. We were tired and dirty each day, but the kids got time to play, our kids got involved in both playing and helping lead games, Annie got to share the gospel to over 450 kids, and many (30+) made commitments to Christ. The pastors of those local churches will maintain follow-up with them, but do pray for them to stay true to their commitments.

We also spent 1 morning feeding and playing with kids at a local orphanage/crisis nursery. One baby was 3 months old and weighed 4 ½ lbs. Another set of 5-month old twin girls were up to 7 lbs after coming in at 4lbs each. Several others were much heartier, and they surprised us all by being so eager for attention and love. There did not appear to be any “attachment disorders” as they vied for our affection, each trying to be cuter than the next! I was ready to take them all home, even though I left wearing the effects of spit-up, runny noses, diarrhea, wet diapers, and messy porridge-eating!

Every busy period needs a Sabbath-rest, so we took the team to the lake, where we camped for 2 nights. It was hard to cook for 13 people over nothing but an open fire, but we managed. And the kids even forgave me for forgetting the marshmallows! Then we went down to a game park, where we stayed in a very nice lodge and saw amazing things. Elephants just yards away. Giant cros far too close for comfort. Hippos munching and talking all night long. Mongooses (mongeese?), duikers, impala, warthogs, waterbuck, kudu, eagles, monitor lizards…are there words to describe such awesomeness???

So thanks, Missouri, for getting us out from behind our desks and our chalkboards. Out in the community, out as a whole family, out enjoying the beauty Malawi has to offer. It’s hard to resent power-outages and petrol shortages too much when you’re basking in the glory of what God has done and does do in and around us!

End of school Chaos

2011-06-02T02:50:00.000-07:00

We are still here, despite what it may seem. When I look at our schedule on paper, I can’t always figure out why I’m collapsing into bed in an exhausted heap each night. But it has been an absolutely crazy, busy month and it’s not looking to calm down any. Chad has lots of extra things with the end of the school year, and the kids have their recitals and sports days and awards ceremonies. The volunteers, who are doing great, still need help with errands here and there. The clinic is busy and chaotic. Our phone is out and has been for almost 4 months now, and there is no fresh milk in the city because they’ve run out of labels to put on the milk jugs. Seriously?

But we’re having fun with lots of people around all the time. The girls have quickly figured out they can dish it back to Chad, so they’re keeping him on his toes. We had the graduating students over for dinner last night and they feasted on tacos and pizza and chocolate cake—all 3 were first-time experiences for many of them! (But let me tell you, feeding and cleaning up after 15 people is no small task, in case you were wondering!) Chad’s mom, Sharon, and sister, Lisa, are here for the week, and they’re loving on our kids while we try to catch up with all the backing-up work we’ve been too busy to do. The kids are really who they came to see, anyway!

Ethan is very tired of homework and is struggling to finish the year strong—I can hardly blame him, since I always wanted to fade at the end too. I’m hoping summer break gives him some of his focus back. Anya is dreading the end, because her very best friend is going back to the US for good. I anticipate a flood of tears for weeks after Lydia leaves, and it will likely make me shed some of my own. Saying good-bye to loved ones is such a traumatic event, I’m permanently scarred by having had to do it so often in my life! Of all miracles, though, Lydia’s hometown is just 20 minutes from where we have a house in central Oregon, so we’ll see her again over furlough. God’s mercy extends even into the desires of a 9-yr old’s heart!
Isaac continues to run around bare-footed and filthy, washing the car, harvesting maize, and sweeping the driveway. Omara is sitting up now, babbling away to us. She and Isaac have such a neat friendship already—her face just lights up when he comes into the room, and he showers her with hugs and kisses whenever he can.

So I’ll try to do a better job at keeping up with you all this summer, but we’ve got a lot going on. Evangelism sports camps, game parks, village trips, a 9-day drive around Zambia, Zimbabwe and Botswana (!!), lots of friends visiting, all while trying to give the kids some degree of structure. Pray for us!

Betty Crocker-free zone

2011-05-02T05:52:00.000-07:00

I am greatly benefiting from being here, surrounded by the amazing cooks in our mission. They share all their recipes with me, and I can’t believe how simple it actually is to make most things. I've had my problems. For example, did you know that garlic salt and garlic powder are not the same thing? And that mapeline can not be substituted for vanilla? But overall, it's been "a piece of cake." Now, I’m not saying I’ll continue to roll out tortillas or strain curdled milk to press out my own cream cheese when I no longer need to. But to whip out a cake with hardly a second thought? Awesome!
I do have a question, though, for all you chemistry buffs out there. Take the following recipe for Wacky Cake (try it, it’s amazing!)
3 c flour 2 Tbsp vinegar
2 c sugar 2 tsp vanilla
½ c unsweetened cocoa 2/3 cup oil
1 tsp salt 2 cups cold water
1 ½ tsp baking soda

Mix first 5 ingredients together well. Make 3 wells in
the powder: in 1 well, pour vinegar, in the second,
pour vanilla, in the 3rd, pour the oil. Pour cold water
over all of it, and mix well. Bake at 375 for 35-40 minutes.

Ok, I’ve already admitted I’m still a novice, so I haven’t ‘rocked the boat’ enough to try making this cake without following the directions. But will someone please tell me: why the wells? Is there some chemical reason the three need to be separated until it’s all flooded with cold water and mixed together? It was never covered in my General Chemistry class, I’m afraid, and it’s driving me crazy!
(Jon Rhoad, this one’s for you)

2 year anniversary

2011-04-12T23:53:00.000-07:00

It’s April 7th. Exactly 2 years ago today we landed, jet-lagged and emotionally exhausted, in Malawi. We walked down the stairs off the plane and onto the tarmac. Anya stretched out her arms, turned in slow circles, and declared in awe, “home, sweet home, sweet home...”. At the same time, Ethan collapsed spread-eagle on the ground and wailed, “I just can’t take any more!” And Isaac took it all in stride, like there was nothing out of the ordinary happening. Now there are times I resonate with how Ethan felt that morning. But for the most part, it’s flown by with relative ease. Seriously...2 years? It hardly seems possible!
I don’t want to pretend that it’s been easy. A couple things have been particularly challenging. One is just missing family, knowing that our kids are growing up and they’re all missing it. A second thing is the sea of ‘angst’ I find myself floating in most of the time: having so much more than others, and wanting to help, but knowing that so many well-intentioned efforts to help actually do more harm. So I’m paralyzed, wanting to make a difference in the face of overwhelming needs and yet not knowing how. Then there’s the emotional stress of trying to function in another culture, where nothing comes naturally and every word and every facial expression and every idea has to be filtered first, to make sure it’s appropriate and means what I mean to mean. Just yesterday I told a man I wanted to test his blood for anemia and he burst into tears because the term “test your blood” means to check for HIV!
So the miracle isn’t that it’s been easy. It’s that, even though it’s NOT been easy, we actually look back on these past 2 years and smile, knowing that they’ve been GOOD years. We’ve grown spiritually, our family has become closer, we’ve had lots of adventures and have stories to tell, we’ve made new great new friends. I’ve even learned how to cook! So maybe the lesson is that EASY and GOOD aren’t actually related when it comes to life.

Update

2011-03-11T05:30:00.000-08:00

Life goes on with predictable unpredictability. Omara has hit 4 months, smiles like crazy, laughs every now and then, and has rolled over once. She loves her maize cereal, though I'm not sure how much actually makes it down her throat. She has entirely rejected the pacifier (yeah!) in exchange for her thumb--whoops. I sucked my thumb until I was in 4th grade, and I thought I might actually escape having a thumb-sucker myself! That appears not to be the case. I think it's why she sleeps through the night though, and to be honest, I'll take the fight to wean her from the thumb in 3 or 4 years over exhaustion right now!

Chad's done with his quarter and has a whole 4 weeks off. In that time he is going to an evangelism community outreach weekend in a village up north (it'll be great but no vacation!) and a week-long mission meeting, as well as reading up to prepare his lectures for next term (Revelations!!! Yikes!)

The clinic is going fine--we had a 9-yr old girl die of malaria on Thursday. They got to the clinic after it closed on Wednesday, so they just decided to come back Thursday morning. She slipped into a coma and died about 45 minutes after getting to us. I will never get used to all this death. I also spent 2 full afternoons in the clinic last week chasing my own kids around while baby Miriam was seen (frantic call that the baby was "hot" and "won't eat" turned out to be a bout of colic...whew!) and while the nanny's sister (who is covering for her maternity leave) was having a miscarriage. I know it was the right thing to do, to help them with medical care, but let me tell you...the right thing does NOT mean the easy thing! I would have helped them at the hospital instead, except none of the nurses or docs have been paid for 3 months, so they're starting to go on strike. Hmmmm.

I have a poster-presentation to do on our ministry team for Theological Education this week, and then next week I'm in the clinic in the am and teaching a class on health to the students' wives in the afternoon, and then we go to the mission meeting. It'll be April before I know it, and then volunteers start coming. I'm so excited about them, but I'm also frantically doing all the logistics to get ready for them. It's a lot!!! We're pretty booked all summer, with someone here from the first week of May until the 3rd week of August (seriously!) but if anyone is interested, next year is wide open, and I'll be even better at it by then! =)

The pain of powerlessness

2011-02-22T22:30:00.001-08:00

Agnes, our beloved nanny, has children the same ages as ours. She started working for us when Isaac was just 5 months old, and her son Clement was just 3 months. Perhaps it's the working-mother thing, but my heart went out to her immediately, knowing how hard it is to do the juggling necessary to make ends meet. Clement was hospitalized several times that first year, for malaria and asthma and double-pneumonia and measles! Every time the phone rang at 4:30 or 5am, I knew he was sick again and she was taking him to the hospital. I didn't even know about the children's ward's 70% mortality rate then, but I still knew enough to start praying! I didn't know if I would survive the stress of that first year of Clement's life, let alone if he would!

But he did, and he's now a healthy, active 2 year old--talking circles around Isaac and already potty-trained! And then, as I was starting to get big with Omara, Agnes tearfully confided that she was unexpectedly pregnant again, due 3 months after me! It took her some time to get excited about the pregnancy, because she was worried about the financial cost of another child. But oh, did she ever fall in love with Omara. She would sit for hours and talk to her, coo with her, and pray that she would have a little girl as well!

A week and a half ago, I got another midnight call...she was on her way to the hospital! By 10am, they called to say mom and baby were healthy, and it was a girl! And then it all started again. The next morning, they called to say the baby was sick already...103 degree fever that started 12 hours after birth! I drove out and talked with the nurses to make sure treatments were right, and prayed with Agnes and the yet-unnamed baby. And my heart felt heavy. I agonized with how involved I should get. By the next day, I had decided to offer to pay for a transfer to a private ward when they called again to say the fever was gone and they were ready for discharge! This solved one problem (what to do for her) but sent new pangs of anxiety through me (what neonatal sepsis can be treated with 1 1/2 days of antibiotic injections??? My Neonatal nurse friends would be horrified!). But what could I do??? So I drove them home and told her, in no uncertain terms, that she was to call me at any hour at the first sign of a returning fever, poor feeding, or other symptoms of illness. And I prayed. What I really wanted to do was whisk Agnes away and keep them 'hostage' in my clean house, eating 3 healthy meals a day, with access to clean, warm water, showers, and flushable toilets! But I realized that there is nothing I can do to make sure this little baby survives other than to pray for it and to offer help when asked.

A week after they got home, I got another call from them, and my heart sank when I saw the number. I answered with dread, but instead of bad news, her husband said, "Madam--we are still waiting for a name." Excuse me??? Yes, apparently they were waiting for ME to name their daughter, and they were wondering what was taking so long! I was caught completely off guard--I hadn't realized I might need to keep a list of potential names for other people's children! As I stumbled around awkwardly, trying to come up with a good name, he just laughed and asked if it would be ok to just name her Miriam!

I am amazingly honored, and I can't wait for Agnes to come back to work (in 3 months) because she'll bring little Miriam with her and our girls will grow up playing together. I also realize there's no hope for me to have an anxiety-free year. Not only do I love her mom, and cherish all new babies, but now she's my name-sake. I'd better start praying now!

3 months and still golden

2011-02-08T00:59:00.000-08:00

Omara is 3 months old already! I can hardly believe how quickly time is flying with her baby-days, perhaps because she remains so easy to accomodate. She smiles more, laughs and coos, and is unsuccessfully trying to roll over. We found vaccine for everything except pneumococcal (pneumonia), and she's 5.25kg (11.5 lbs) and ready to start malaria preventative meds this week, if we can find any (of all annoying things to have shortages of!)

Meanwhile, the other kids are doing great also. Anya continues to thrive at ABC Academy, where she's on the swim team, in ballet, and in the choir. Her teacher is great, and her confidence has never been higher (that brings it's own host of challenges, but better that than the alternative!). Ethan has settled into the routine of real homework (yes, in KG) and is reading like a champ, whizing through math, and continuing to charm with his great smile and adorable owl-hair. Isaac is back to hearing English and Chichewa, so he's slowed down his efforts to talk again, but I'm not worried. One of these days he'll break through and we'll never have a moment of silence again. We're interested in starting some movement towards potty training, but our first trial resulted in him gleefully peeing on the dining room wall. Perhaps we'll wait until we're not all so busy!

Hoofbeats

2011-02-08T00:43:00.000-08:00

My professor in Nursing school, affectionately known as "Ma Barker," had a favorite saying: When you hear hoofbeats, think horses, not zebra. The meaning? Common diseases happen commonly. A patient with nasal congestion is much more likely to have a cold than Wegener's granulomatosis. Obviously! But I had a thought yesterday, as I reviewed my textbooks in some clinic down-time. What if you live in Africa???

There is a whole host of diagnoses that aren't even on my radar because they're such 'zebra', and yet here a fever is more likely to be a potentially fatal malaria than a virus. A sore knee is often septic arthritis. I've seen chicken pox for the first time in my career (!), and I have to think about diptheria, measles, and tetnus as possible diagnoses. Stomach "bugs" and coughs could be caused by all sorts of nasty worms that I can hardly think about, lest I get nauseated. (Did you know that one of the common parasitic worms travels through the feet, up the blood stream to the lungs, where it then requires the host, aka us, to cough them up and then swallow them into the stomach where they can finally lay their eggs?) I tell you, when it comes to tropical medicine, sometimes ignorance is bliss.

At least it was...now I hear zebra everywhere I turn!

Omara updates

2011-01-09T06:58:00.000-08:00

She's sweet, she's calm, she sleeps all night--so far, I've finally gotten my 'easy' baby! Omara is 2 months old and already over 10 pounds. Her newest trick is a toothless grin to show off her dimples. It's always such a milestone when they start to smile, since it's the first evidence of her acknowledging me as anything other than a food-source!

I started back at the clinic this week, and was a bit nervous about leaving her. It's gone so well, though. She's taking a bottle like a pro for that one feeding, and she and Ms Agnes are getting along great. I've had moments of wishing I hadn't asked God for a chance to work in a clinic again--like when my first patient reported loosing his "voice and legs" suddenly. After I convinced him the laryngitis and legs probably weren't connected, I had to work for 15 minutes trying to figure out what he meant by the fact that his knee joints were numb (he had quad weakness, making his knees give out when walking!). Or when I had so confidently diagnosed a teenager as having a simple virus causing his "1 day of fever and sinus-type headache", when his mother came into the room and said, "So, what's causing the auditory hallucinations and bright flashing lights that he sees? And why has it been going again and coming back now for 15 days?" Oh, what I wouldn't do for a simple cold! But when it's all said and done, I am happy to be there, happy to be challenged, happy to have been blessed by such a full life with no ending to bizarre stories. Oh, did I mention a poisonous snake crawled up into the x-ray machine while my patient was getting a chest x-ray? Took down the x-ray for the rest of the day, so I just treated him for pneumonia empirically. See what I mean???

2011 already?

2011-01-07T02:27:00.001-08:00

I’m sure I’m not alone when I say it’s almost inconceivable—Y2K was just the other day, wasn’t it? Anyway, the calendar tells me it is indeed 2011, though the New Year slipped by with little fanfare by us. The rest of the missionaries got together to party, but we (the youngest) bowed out and went to bed early. I tell myself it’s because no one else has kids who wake them up the next morning at 5:30am, but I was left with a distinct feeling of getting old!

We’ve started the new year by getting ourselves ready for success, just like I’m sure many of you have. You know what I mean…the typical resolutions. We’ve committed to exercising together 3 times a week, I’m working on being better at reading to the kids before they go to bed, rather than watching videos (the power being off several nights this week sure has helped!), we de-wormed the kids. You know, the typical new year stuff!

We had a great visit with Miriam’s family, though it’s left us battling some homesickness now that they’re gone. I used to fear it was a sign of weakness in my commitment to be where God wants us to be, to be homesick or to have days of wishing we had a ‘normal’ life close to family and friends. But I recently had lunch with the other missionary ladies here, and listening to them share their grief over missing family made me realize it’s just a part of life out here. Commitment to doing God’s will isn’t about feeling happy about everything all the time…it’s about finding peace in each situation and working through the hard parts.

So ‘real life’ begins on Monday. Chad’s already back to teaching, but the kids start school and Miriam starts back to her 3 days per week at the clinic then. Omara will stay with Isaac and Agnes, our wonderful nanny, for those few hours, at least until Agnes has her baby sometime in March—we’re praying that situation works ok for everyone: that Omara takes a bottle, that she stays healthy, and that Agnes remains healthy with her pregnancy! It’s nice to know that Miriam isn’t locked into the hours at the clinic, and if it really doesn’t work, she can back out until Omara is a little older. Mission work most definitely requires us to be flexible, but at the same time I have to admit it gives us some of that flexibility back!

First weeks back

2010-12-16T01:09:00.000-08:00

I’ve been back for 10 days now. I have to say, it’s been a little harder than I expected. Not that I thought adjusting to being a family of 6 would be a walk in the park, but Omara’s almost 6 weeks old already. I thought we’d done a lot of adjusting already! There haven’t been any major issues, but normal every day life here can be issue enough to make anyone crazy. And it’s all the little things, you know? Like trying to get kids to school on time, and all the stores running out of milk, and Isaac being back in the world of needing 2 baths and 4 changes of clothes each day, and mud everywhere, and flies swarming, and killer mosquitoes on the attack (Omara is too small to take malaria-prevention meds). Oh, and that’s not to mention the unbelievable headache of having our modem-phone stolen (which eliminates our internet access from the desktop) at the same time the lap-top crashed (again!) so we’ve been frantically trying to get back on-line to submit year-end budget and ministry reports as required for work. I’ve decided that living life on Africa-time (AKA…no hurries) is fine as long as you don’t have to meet deadlines from the world of efficiency. But it’s a perfect storm to have American standards to meet from here, and last week we surely got stormed on! After a few tears and several rants and raves, we got it taken care of thanks to flash-drives and coworkers letting us borrow computers and internet time.

The kids are now out of school for a month, so we not only have 4 kids, we have 4 kids under-foot. Thankfully they all adore their new sister and we haven’t had any jealousy issues. But our nanny, who is also 6 months pregnant, got hit by a taxi and thrown into a ditch on Monday. She and baby are fine, other than bruised ribs and a strained knee, so after just 2 days off she’s back and insisting on helping out so much I feel like I have to watch her as well. Yesterday I caught her on her hands and knees polishing our floor, and I can’t get her to stop!

But tomorrow my parents and my brother and his wife arrive to spend 10 days with us. It will be wonderful to see them, and for them to see us. They haven’t seen Isaac since he was 6 weeks old…he’s now running around collecting creepy crawlies and we have a new 6 week old! We’ll finally celebrate Isaac’s 2nd birthday (he doesn’t know we skipped it last week), go to the lake, and maybe a game park. We’ll have a big family Christmas again, though we’ll miss my “baby” brother and his wife who are back in Oregon. And they’re bringing cranberries…seriously, what can go wrong when there are cranberries involved???

Passport adventures

2010-11-23T10:31:00.001-08:00

Omara is automatically an American citizen, having been born to American parents. However, to formally file her birth and claim said citizenship, we had to meet with the US Consular at the Embassy today. Actually, Chad had to go last week and file permission for her to get a passport since he wouldn't be here for today's appointment. They require both parent's notarized request for a passport to keep one parent from being able to kidnap a child. Anyway, armed with all the necessary documents, I headed out today to file for "Birth Abroad" and request a passport.

These necessary documents were no small feat! In addition to the notarized "letter of concern" from Chad, I also had to have the passport application, birth abroad application, her birth certificate, our marriage license, my passport, and last but not least, 2 passport photos of her. Yes, of Omara, at 2 weeks old. In order to get these, I had to lay her on the coffee table on a white blanket during a moment when she was awake but happy and not hungry. Then I had to get her with both eyes open but no red-eye glare, both ears showing, no hands visible, and her face between 1"x1 3/8" and 2"x2". Yeah right!!! Omara was actually remarkably compliant, and the photo shop only had to 'photoshop' out her hands that insisted on being beside her head.

The embassy trip itself went without a hitch. Everyone was very sweet, even insisting I go nurse her in an interview room when she developed a terrible case of the hiccups! Supposedly I'll get the documents in 7-10 days and then we'll be free to travel.

After all the hassle of getting the things together, I can't help but roll my eyes over the fact that she'll be stuck traveling on this passport, widely accepted as the best form of photo ID, for 5 years using a photo that (hopefully!) won't look a thing like her a month from now!

Livin' it up in South Afrcia

2010-11-23T10:10:00.000-08:00

Omara's first petting zoo Don't worry--our windows were rolled up tightly!

Us all with the yet-unnamed baby giraffe, slightly bigger than Omara at 4-days old

The vicious attack-bird Isaac discovering the fear of waterslides

What is a family to do when stuck in South Africa for weeks, awaiting a new baby’s passport? Dreadful as it is, we’ve tried to make the best of it. With Omara being sweet and mild and very portable, we found ways to entertain ourselves…so many ways, in fact, that I’m quite behind in posting updates!

Day 4 after birth we headed out to a game-park, where we petted lion cubs, and spotted any number of gazelle, zebra, ostrich and huge prides of lions sleeping just feet from our car. We also took pictures of Omara with the baby giraffe who shares her birthday!

Day 5 we went to a bird sanctuary. Isaac has been particularly fond of birds…pointing out every one he sees and chasing any that dare land near us. We were right in that he loved seeing the hundreds of species from all over the world. I underestimated how much the rest of us would enjoy it as well. Anya made quite an impression on one bird who chased her all over the aviary and attacked Chad’s flip-flop when he tried to step between them!

Later we drove 2 hours north to a real live water park built at a natural hot springs. I enjoyed a good book while watching Omara as the older kids played it up with the slides, wave pool, and lazy river. Isaac did not find the slides nearly as fun, and after 1 or 2 terror-filled trips down, he contented himself in the kiddie pool! On the way home we ate ice cream in a restaurant built over top of the 4-lane freeway, watching the cars and trucks whiz underneath us. With pure glee, Isaac screamed out “car” with every one that passed, so we didn’t linger too long!
Sprinkled between these big events, we ate at McDonalds, drank real milkshakes, the kids played 30 holes of putt-putt golf, and we had a braii with friends (pronounced ‘bry’—the South African word for BBQ) complete with kudu steaks and sausages. Oh, and I made a wicked-good ostrich meatloaf. And a pecan pie with the nuts Anya collected from the tree growing beside our apartment.

So all in all, I’d say we’ve had a good time down here! Chad, Anya and Isaac are back in Malawi now, having safely arrived back on Sunday and survived the first day back in the “real world” of school and teaching yesterday. At the last minute, we changed Ethan’s ticket and kept him here with me in Joburg to make things easier for Chad. I have no doubt he could have handled all 3 just fine, but the class he’s teaching is in the afternoon, when the kids are home from school. With me being here, the older kids would have had limited supervision (Isaac is well cared-for by the nanny). Anya will do just fine with that, but as dear as Ethan is, we are also aware of his considerable skill at getting into trouble without quite meaning to if left to his own devices! So I'm not getting the endless naps and peaceful lounging I had imagined, but we're doing well together. But as nice as all the luxury has been, I realized today that I'm starting to feel more than ready to get home again. Even after Chad reported the power going off 4 times his first day back!

Photos of Omara

2010-11-08T07:05:00.001-08:00

Omara Layne Pumpelly
Born November 4, 2010 at 2:20pm
6 lbs 10oz, 19.3" long

Omara Layne

2010-11-08T07:02:00.000-08:00

I have now known the entire spectrum of birth experiences possible! From C-section to natural birth, from precipitous labor to failure-to-progress, from medication-free to an epidural that didn’t work. I haven’t decided why it was necessary for me to experiences all the options, but I’ve ended up with a healthy baby each time, so I know I shouldn’t complain.
After Isaac’s rapid (3 hour!) entrance into the world, my OB told me to come in the minute contractions started. I thought I was being daring but reasonable by waiting until they were steadily 8-10 minutes apart for 2 ½ hours first, and then we drove to the hospital at midnight. I was quite discouraged when the nurse told me baby wasn’t fully engaged and I was only 2cm! So I made Chad try to get some rest while I walked up and down the stairs the rest of the night until my thighs couldn’t take the burn anymore. The contractions were strong enough I couldn’t sleep anyway. But nothing increased except in intensity—and imagine my horror to find I had only progressed to 3cm by 5am the next morning.

I’ll spare you the gory details of the rest of the day, but it was not pretty. Eventually the contractions picked up and hit me every 1 ½ - 2 minutes, but still I wasn’t progressing like I expected to. I was determined to do it without pain medication, as I did the last 2 births, but the psychological stress of the contractions not ‘working’ the way they were supposed to took its toll. I could handle the pain when it was doing something, but to feel as if they were useless? Horrible. I started to worry that maybe I was getting so exhausted and stressed that maybe I was fighting my own body, so I finally broke down and agreed to an epidural in hopes of being able to relax. But the anesthesiologist took 2 hours to get to me, during which my efforts at telling myself “just a few more contractions” lost all effectiveness. When I finally got the epidural, it only numbed one side, so with every contraction I felt all the same pain, only localized in one hip, and I was confined to bed. It was my worst nightmare! Again, I’ll spare the details, but I got to 10cm and ready to push after just a few minutes of that agony, and Omara was born with very little effort after that. Start to finish, it was 16 hours. Rediculous!!!

When it was all over, I decided it was like planning a big party and expecting to have fun, only to look back and realize it was too much work to have been any fun at all. I actually enjoyed the last 2 births, but this one was too much. But again, Omara is healthy, I’m healthy, and she’s eating like a champ. It’s just not an experience I ever plan on having again! I’ve covered all my bases, I’ve experienced all the options, and I’m quite content being done. We have our A, E, I, and O…U can be the urologist!

Endocrine praise

2010-11-02T10:23:00.000-07:00

We met with the endocrinologist today, and Ethan has grown just enough to keep the doctor happy! He said he was shocked—the only thing stranger than the way Ethan just up and stopped growing for no discernable reason was the fact that he started growing again with no intervention. He hasn’t come close to catching up to where he should be, but the rate of growth for the last 4 months was back to normal. The doc said he would have really “insisted” on hormone injections had he not grown, and I was ready to insist we wait a little longer even if he hadn’t grown, so I’m glad we didn’t have to have that show-down! We’ll have to follow up in July of next year again, but that’s ok. I’ll be ready for another McFlurry by that time anyway!

Otherwise we’re all doing well. The kids had a hard time going to the mall today…so much to see, so much to want, so many times we said no. They just couldn’t understand why we can’t do all the fun things and get all the treats we haven’t seen in two years, all today.

Together Again

2010-11-01T00:03:00.000-07:00

After a minor delay and a huge lightning storm, Chad and the kids arrived yesterday. Isaac is still a little clingy to me at times, but he is so excited to have his dad and his siblings around. For the first time in 3 weeks, I didn't have to spend 2+ hours getting him to bed...he just lay beside Anya as she sang and talked to him, and he eventually fell asleep without a fuss. And then Chad got up with him in the night while I stayed in my toasty bed. There are some joys that know no bounds!

As we drove home from the airport yesterday, Anya saw the Golden Arches and said, "McDonalds? Man, this place ROCKS!" How is it that I'm about to bring a new child into the world at the same time my oldest is threatening to jump head-first into teeny-bopper-ville? What were we thinking!?!?

And baby has still made no appearance, and no indication that she has any plans to soon. She is settled a little lower than before (which my rib cage is thankful for but my bladder has taken issue with) and the sciatic pain in my right hip is worse than before, so I'm feeling ready to be 'released'. But she seems to be content to hang out in there a little longer. We have 4 different doctors appointments in the next 3 days, trying to get everyone's medical needs taken care of while we're here anyway. I was hoping she would either come yesterday so I could be recovered and out of the hospital by the time Ethan needs to go to the Endocrinologist (Tuesday) or now that she waits until after all the appointments are over.

Perspective

2010-10-26T23:10:00.000-07:00

I just came back from an OB appointment, one where I “made wee-wee” on the stick, had my BP checked without the use of a stethoscope, and had an ultrasound which determined that “baby is growing and the gender hasn’t changed.” As a nurse practitioner, I always want to champion preventative care, but this is feeling more than a little like a waste of time!!!!
I was feeling sorry for myself, having to chase Isaac around the waiting room for 45 minutes and then manage him in the exam room during the ultrasound, and I was drowning my self-pity in my weekly McFlurry (a most justified reward after such a morning, I’ve decided) when Chad called.

He had just spent over 2 hours standing in lines at 2 different banks in Lilongwe after the ATM took our money back before he could get it! Of course, the first bank could do nothing and sent him to the central bank…which could do nothing either. They recommend “letting our US bank deal with it.” Like they’re going to believe us that the ATM stole our money back after charging us!!!! Then he had to argue with the phone company because they turned off our phone due to unpaid phone bills of other Baptist Mission properties (ours, mind you, was paid up and current), most of which don’t even have functioning phone-lines.

So now I’m not thinking I’ve got such a raw deal, as I’ve finished off the Quarter Pounder and the McFlurry, even if they did forget to give me my fries (fast food is fast food, no matter the country!) and I’m working on getting Isaac to think an afternoon nap sounds like fun. Things could always be worse… much worse!!!

A few of my favorite things

2010-10-20T04:30:00.000-07:00

The best things about being in South Africa for a breather:

1. Fruit and yogurt!!! My fridge is packed with nectarines, peaches, apples, grapes, and Isaac devours a bowl of yogurt and granola every morning like it’s the best thing he’s ever eaten! We can get some things in Lilongwe, but not as easily or cheaply as here. I love it! (Lest you get the wrong idea about me, I’m loving the chocolate that’s readily available too!)
2. Using debit cards. No longer do I have to fret over making sure I have enough cash to check-out of the grocery store without an eye-roll of the cashier for having to take items back out of my cart! I can just run the plastic and it pays for whatever I wanted to buy…dangerous, but oh so lovely!
3. McDonalds McFlurrys. I am not much of a fast-food junkie, and we rarely went in the US. But I can’t tell you how amazing it is to run through a drive-through after our weekly doctors’ appointment, buy lunch for ourselves and the kids, and get a McFlurry (Oreo, most definitely)to treat ourselves for surviving another week. Those calories have never tasted so good!
4. Grass. You can’t quite comprehend the dirt that is all over Lilongwe until you witness it yourself, but I promise you that it’s red, it’s everywhere, and it’s impossible to get out of clothing. People intentionally sweep to prevent grass from growing, though I have yet to figure out why. But here, grass actually is allowed to grow, so dirt is kept on the ground! Our apartment isn’t dusty, our clothes aren’t stained, and Isaac only needs one bath each day!
5. Internet. I know a lot of people complain about the internet here being slow, and I suppose there are places where it’s even better. But coming from Lilongwe where I can spend 2 hours trying to send reimbursement receipts by e-mail to our home office and still not be successful, I’m in internet heaven. I can upload photos, update the blog, even look at Facebook—something I haven’t done since my last visit to Joburg in June!

So they may be small things, and taken for granted in most places, but I tell you. It’s the small things that can seem to make it or break it when life gets crazy. So right now, I’m just feeling like Isaac, going in a glass elevator for the first time and squealing with delight over the ride!

Foreign birth

2010-10-17T13:13:00.000-07:00

I never thought much about how having a baby in a different country might be. People usually ask about the safety factor, which I feel is a non-issue here in South Africa. The hospital is exactly like one you would find in any city in the US, if not fancier. So the surprises have come in the little details. Like no internal exams during any prenatal appointment—not until active labor! Not that I’m complaining, exactly. I just liked knowing how things were progressing towards labor there those last weeks. They also won’t check for Group B strep until labor starts, which means they don’t get the results for 3 days after birth—great for knowing what’s wrong if a baby ‘crashes’, but not so good for preventing it from happening! And then for the hospital, we are required to bring our own chux pads (waterproof “linen saver” pads for the bed), diapers, wipes, baby shampoo, rubbing alcohol (required for umbilical cord care, which US hospitals don’t even do any more). We even have to purchase disposable underwear from the hospital pharmacy prior to admission!!! The baby can’t be bathed in water until after 24 hours, but is rubbed down with rubbing alcohol directly after birth instead. The husband/dad can’t sleep at the hospital and visiting hours are just 4 hours per day divided between morning, afternoon and evening (though the dad can stay all day) and there’s a ‘compulsory rest time’ for moms from 2-4pm where no one is allowed in the rooms. How bizarre it all seems to us! I’m starting to wonder if I don’t need to let go of all my assumptions and past experiences of childbirth and just roll with the punches here—this may be my 4th pregnancy, but I’m a first-timer to South African ways. And Toto, we’re definitely not in Kansas anymore!

The Big 5

2010-10-15T11:01:00.000-07:00

We’ve survived 5 days on our “own” here in Joburg now, though with all of us milling around it’s hardly been lonely! Isaac is doing great—sleeping has even improved a bit. There are Pack-N-Plays available here, but he can climb over the sides, so the trundle is pulled out between two twin beds, and it gives a sense of being contained on 3 sides, at least! He is also more clingy than usual, not wanting to let me out of his sight—but as long as he has a visual, he’s quite happy to play and even entertain himself enough that I’m on book #2 already. He’s giving more hugs and snuggles than ever, which I certainly am not complaining about. And speaking more words even—I don’t know if it’s hearing only English for the first time in 18 months or if it’s the absence of his chatty brother and sister that has finally given him a chance!
Today we walked the mile to the coffee shop next door to the Wimpy hamburger place, where I thoroughly enjoyed a mocha milkshake and Isaac got to experience a fast-food restaurant’s play area. And hallelujah, I didn’t have to climb up through the maze myself to get him down, as I pictured in my nightmares!
Of us “Big 5,” one has a healthy baby boy after a scheduled C-section, one is in labor as I type, and one is about to pop any day now. Then there are the two of us who have to wait until November…it’s hard enough being patient without watching everyone else meet their babies while I continue to waddle along!!! At least us late-bloomers are due just 2 days apart, so neither of us should be the lone “Big 1” for too long.
As far as I hear, Chad is doing well with Anya and Ethan. After leaving me at the airport, they continued on to the lake where they camped, complete with roasted hotdogs and S’mores around a campfire, spent hours swimming, and then went to a local game-park. The plan was camel rides there, but I haven’t heard if that was possible. It’s not worked out very well to stay in touch with them…the skype calling is not working, and it’s not affordable to call from here or for him to call me, so we’re reduced to e-mail. As much as I think our choice of having them come Oct 31 was the right one, I’m feeling like it is an awfully long way away still. This has ended up being such a sweet, relaxing time so far I wish he was here to share it with me. Of course, with all 3 kids here, who knows how long the sweet and relaxing will stay around!

T-minus 4 weeks now!

Greetings from sunny Joburg

2010-10-11T12:03:00.000-07:00

Isaac and I made the trip down with minimal adventure yesterday and we’re doing well. The trip started out with our travel agent mentioning that Isaac (as a baby-in-the-lap) had to be “attached” to a “fake person” who had a real itinerary very different from my own, but that she just manually changed the dates on his ticket to make it look like he was traveling with me…but that it should be no problem. Sounded like a problem to me, but sure enough! No problem. Of course, they did have a problem with me being pregnant. Despite my officially stamped letter from a doctor clearing me for travel, made me wait 40 minutes before finally agreeing to let me fly, after a stern warning that they would “leave me behind” if it was up to them and making me put into writing that I would not hold them accountable if anything happened in the air.

During all this I had Isaac in the stroller so that I could buckle and contain him…a brilliant move on my part until it came to the 4 flights of stairs and no elevator. Thankfully he walked up the stairs with great joy as I carried the computer, diaper bag, carry-on bag and stroller. Good thing I’m “fit!”

Imagine my joy when I discovered we had a window seat –entertainment and containment all in one! Then again, imagine my amusement when the other two people in the row looked as if they were in competition with me for “biggest belly on the airplane”. I won by having Isaac on my lap, but it was a close call! I’m sure we made a pretty picture, the 4 of us squeezed into 3 seats—I’m just glad there was no one around to actually take the picture. I willed my bladder to be strong and endure the 2.5 hours of holding Isaac, because I knew there was no getting up once we wedged into that seat, and God was gracious! Isaac was a complete angel, never fussed at all even when the lunch tray was resting on his chest for lack of room (!), and he even slept for a blissful hour—long enough for me to recharge.

The apartment they have us in here in Joburg is amazing—comfortable, spacious, well-furnished. There are 5 of us pregos here, due on various dates ranging from tomorrow until me in mid-November, and all but one family have other young kids here as well. The playground is hopping as we large-ones sit in the shade and visit and the kids play. It’s actually been wonderful, despite the fact that Isaac is not sleeping well without a crib, as I feared. The staff here are affectionately calling us “The Big 5,” which is funny until they try to decide which one of us represents the elephant, which one the rhino, which one the buffalo, etc!

The doctor says everything looks perfect, and he even printed out a 3-D photo of her face for me today. The poor child definitely has Chad’s nose =) but is just as adorable as can be. I never cease to be amazed at what technology can make possible! Now that I’m down here, I’m rather anxious for the next step to come (ie meeting this little one!) and it might be hard to watch as all the other ladies come home with their babies. Of course, this is mostly their 2nd baby, and it’s my 4th, so I could beat some of them—hopefully not the one due tomorrow, since Chad doesn’t come until the 31st! But the waiting game is officially on. T-minus 4 weeks and 5 days, if anyone’s counting.

Graduation photo

2010-10-04T01:03:00.001-07:00

This is the same photo as on our prayer letter, but in case any of you don't get it or couldn't open it, this is the group photo of all 20 students and their spouses on graduation day.

And life races on

2010-10-01T03:01:00.000-07:00

few I knew it had been a few days since I last wrote...but 3 weeks? Where has the time gone??? I can not believe I leave for Joburg in 9 days. And call me slow, but it just dawned on me that I'll be gone for 2 whole months! I was thinking about the 3 weeks before Chad and the older kids come. Then the 3 weeks that we'll all be down there. Then the 3 weeks when it will be just me and the new one. And 3 weeks doesn't sound like all that long. But I'll be back December 10th, the day before Isaac's 2nd birthday, just 2 weeks before Christmas!!! I've got some serious planning and packing to do!

Meanwhile, things have been good. Despite my silence, my 3 mornings at the clinic have been going very well and don't feel at all overwhelming. It's a perfect amount of time. I'm also helping in Anya's classroom as a 'reading monitor' 2 of those mornings since the clinic doesn't open until 8. Ethan's teacher laughs when trying to describe what kind of a student he is, but she has also been remarkably patient with his distractability. He informed me that he occasionally gets a rain-cloud by his name for forgetting to do 'first-time obedience' but that he's never had a lightening storm, and sometimes he even gets a rainbow for extra-good behavior! Oh, the simple things that work on kids his age!

We survived a very busy but meaningful graduation weekend at the Seminary. There was only a little drama--one spouse made the 10-hour public-transport trip with her 4 day-old baby...their first child, born while he was busy taking exams! The one student from Zambia got picked up 2 days before graduation during an immigration 'sting operation' at an internet cafe (who knew they did those!) and his visa had just expired, so they threw him in jail! After much prayer on all our parts, they released him in time for graduation since he promised he was returning to Zambia the next day (I think the police just wanted him to have to pay for the trip to the border himself!). But other than that, everything went beautifully, and I surprised myself by tearing up as they all proceeded in. They've overcome so many obstacles to study for 4 years, spend all that time and money, be away from their families...and they were just beaming with pride and awe. I'll miss them being around. I'm sure the next group will be just as great, but I really loved those 20 students. What a joy it was to be part of their education!

The first day at the clinic

2010-09-09T06:38:00.000-07:00

I'm officially licensed, though it was no small task! As I suspected, they gave me some trouble at the hospital. Since I'm an NP and do 'clinical diagnosing', they decided I would have to go back and do another 6 weeks under the Medical Council! because that involves things 'outside the scope of practice for a nurse in Malawi'!! After several hours of making me track down random people, wait for "meetings" to finish (the official term for an extended tea break!) and testing my ability to swallow my pride and humbly apologize for causing so much confusion--they signed me through! Whew!

Today I saw patients at the clinic for the first time. It was laid-back and manageable, with plenty of time with each patient. Actually down-right luxurious compared to the hectic pace of community clinics in the US! My first patient was a little confusing--she came in complaining initially of "dry mouth and throat" which then expanded to chest pain, abdominal pain, constipation, trouble breathing when lying down, possible "sugar" (diabetes) and a headache she's had for 30 years. She's taking a BP med but doesn't know what. Lovely! Her heart exam was not good--a murmur, a BP of 190/65 (called isolated systolic high blood pressure) and pulses differing in her two wrists. I think she has some sort of long-term heart problem (aortic stenosis?) on top of stomach ulcers, but with no x-ray, no ultrasound, no echocardiogram, and no way to treat whatever heart condition I diagnosed even if I did have those studies...I ran it by the doctor and she agreed that we can only recommend a follow-up next week with medication IN HAND, low salt diet, and treating the abdominal pain. The fact that she's lived this long (around 70 years, though she doesn't know) is great, and we won't be able to change whatever's causing her heart symptoms anyway. Such a different way of looking at health issues here! Fix what you can, let the rest go...talk about a 'paradigm shift' for me to get used to!

I survived, though the patients can't all say the same

2010-09-02T07:09:00.000-07:00

It's all unofficially over. I have most of my signatures needed from the units, minus two I have to go get tomorrow from people who weren't there today. Then on Monday I have to meet with the Head Matron (otherwise known as the Chief Nursing Officer) and get her to sign off on it all. I have nightmares that she'll find some reason to say I have to do more time, so you all can pray for that meeting!!! Then I have to go to the National Nursing Council where I'll likely sit for hours, and get them to issue me an official license (which is nothing but a stamped receipt saying I've paid for one...you would think they could have just taken my money and bypassed the whole "orientation" thing!!!)

My last week went ok. I did some time in the ER, which is just a glorified mini-surgical clinic where we inserted chest tubes, cleaned burn wounds, and cut open abscesses...none of which I handled well. I will blame it on the pregnancy, but my nursing school friends will know better--I've never had much of a stomach for pus and pain! My friend here has pointed out that here in Malawi, pain is NOT the 5th vital sign (the opposite of a common slogan in US hospitals). When people started passing out from the pain, or calling on Jesus to come and save them, I had to make fast exits and ended up spending much time in the ER parking lot trying not to pass out!

With the chest tube, a full 2 liters of pus immediately came out, overflowing the bottle meant to collect it, sending a volcano of TB-infected pus all over the floor and our shoes. None of us had masks or gowns on...Malawi is "resource challenged" (the understatement of the century!) That's what I got to do when I followed the doctors. When they put me with the nurse (the singular is not a typo) we spent the afternoon folding gauze pads and rolling cotton balls. It was much easier on my stomach, and we had to wear masks so the cotton fibers wouldn't irritate our lungs. Good thing I won't have cotton-irritation to complicate the TB I've just been exposed to!!!!!

Then I was on the medical floor, which went much better than I expected. It wasn't all that busy, though several patients died each day I was there. In fact, surgical is almost twice as busy! I concluded that here, with no CTs or MRIs and limited other 'medical studies' or drugs, it's actually easier to do surgery than treat medically! I never would have thought it! But I rounded with two British medical students (we were on our own, as the attending disappeared for 2 straight days!) with our text books and our notebooks and our nervousness about managing people's crazily complicated conditions (like fever (103), signs of sepsis (heart rate of 170, low BP), TB, anemia (Hgb of 5.3, not low enough to transfuse here...we transfuse at 8 in the US!), HIV, possible gallbladder disease, abdominal mass, heart failure with mild cardiac tampanode, and a swollen right leg...all in the same 23 year-old girl!!!! I celebrated that none of the deaths were of our patients! It's all about the minor victories, I guess.

Kamuzu Central Hospital-weeks 2 and 3

2010-08-31T01:10:00.000-07:00

The saga continues, and only gets worse! I thought I was doing pretty well after the first two weeks--I was exhausted and my feet are swollen every night, but I could see the silver lining in most areas. Week 2 I worked at the HIV/AIDS clinic, where they have a fantastic system with computerized bar codes for each patient and a ton of needed services ranging from nutrition assessments to home-based hospice care from nurses that cruise around on motorcycles! They do see about 250 patients per day (all HIV+) which seemed amazing. And the vast majority of them looked perfectly healthy--it really hit home how the early stages can not be diagnosed by appearance! Then I also did a few days in the "Under 5" clinic where they see kids up to 14. Most were simple out-patient malaria treatments, coughs and colds. We did see a couple of measles cases, a first for me, and then bizarre things like kidney failure in a 10-yr old after a nasty strep infection, heart failure in a 12-yr old with rheumatic heart disease, and 2 cases of meningitis! I did want to tear my hair out over the staff (nurses AND doctors) letting kids sit there in respiratory distress and oxygen levels at 70% for 2 and 3 hours while we 'processed' the admission...just as in every other part of life, there truly is no hurry in Africa--even in a pediatric ER!!!

I was pretty cocky going into week 3, having survived so much already and found things to even enjoy on most days. I thought the pediatric in-patient unit would be a fun place to spend 3 days, seeing as I love kids and feel more comfortable practicing my broken Chichewa with them! Perhaps that is why it nailed me more than any other rotation. They have 175 beds...no, 175 patients on an average day, by putting at least 2 kids in each bed, and 8 nurses. They also have a mortality rate of over 60%...that means more kids DIE while admitted than get discharged!!!! 3 died my first day, and the families lay on the floor of the hall-way wailing and sobbing for hours.
Most kids were young, under 6, and they were sicker than I've ever seen. Cerebral malaria, pneumonia, HIV, malnutrition, hydrocephalus, kidney failure, liver failure due to chronic malaria, meningitis, heart failure due to anemia (I knew this was theoretically possible, but who knew it was common?) and neonatal sepsis due to umbilical cord infections (again, does this really happen???) I came home after my first day, grabbed ahold of Isaac, sat down on the kitchen floor, and cried. The only miracle in that unit is the fact that anyone here lives to adulthood.

Kamuzu Central Hospital-week 1

2010-08-31T01:05:00.000-07:00

I’ve finished my first week at the hospital; only 3 more to go! It’s been such a wild experience already I hardly know how to put it all in words, but I’ll try to give you an idea.
Day 1: we were supposed to meet with the hospital’s director of nursing at 7:30am. We sat on a wooden bench and waited, and at 9:30 her assistant said, “Perhaps she’s running late”. Yes, perhaps! She arrived just before 10 and we were sent off to different units. I got the surgical ward for my first 2-day assignment. It’s supposed to be a 60-bed unit spread over 3 rooms, but they’ve put beds along both sides of the patio with its half-wall, so they’re now considered an 80-bed unit but often will go up to 120 patients by putting mattresses on the floor. The nurse told me, “The problem is that during the rainy season, the patients out on the patio get rained on, but as long as we can give them a bed and the care they need, the rest is just details.” There are 3 nurses on day shift (7:30am-4pm) and 2 nurses on night shift (4pm-7:30am!). The nurses didn’t believe me when I said my unit in the US limited our patient load to 6 per nurse!

Day 2: The nurses don’t do much physical assessment. They’re responsible for med passing, blood draws, dressing changes, and ‘damp dusting’ the whole unit with a bleach solution each shift. At first I wanted to call what they do irresponsible and lazy nursing, but I’ve come to decide that I can’t put my definition of the role of a nurse on them. They’re not trained nor expected to do what I think of as nursing care, which is a shame, but it’s not their fault. I listened to rounds with a medical teams as we planned for an amputation of a man’s hand burned down to the bones and referral of a man with cancer of the palate with a tumor larger than a baseball sticking out of his mouth. The tumor itself had teeth in it, because it had taken over his upper jaw! We gave another man the news that his father had some sort of abdominal cancer because we pulled out bloody fluid from his belly right there in his bed, but there was no point doing a CT scan to diagnose where the cancer was, because there was nothing that could be done in Malawi to treat it anyway. I also helped with med passing, which consisted of us pushing the med cart to the middle of the room, calling out “medicine”, and waiting for the patients’ guardians to bring us their med slips, collect the meds in their hands, and take the pills back to the patients. See, every patient is required to have a guardian who sleeps on the floor under their bed, cooks for them, feeds and washes them, and empties all the catheters and bags and drains. We assume the real patients got the meds, though we wouldn’t know it. If the guardians were not present at that precise moment and the patients were too ill or were asleep, they didn’t get their meds. When I asked what happened in those cases, I was told “it’s part of our nursing assessment…if the patients were really in pain, they would be here to get their meds.” Interesting philosophy.

Days 3-5: I wore street-clothes and my lab coat because I have no maternity scrubs, and they automatically placed me with the doctor during these 3 days in the Out-patient Department…like an urgent care clinic. It was fine with me—the nurses there only draw blood and check BP, and I kind of get the hang of that! In the course of the 3 days, we saw everything. Malaria is common, but I’ve never seen such severe cases of it. One woman was in a near-comatose, non-responsive state after ‘assault’ (aka rape most likely, though we didn’t do an exam), one man we declared dead on arrival. I saw a woman with advanced AIDS with cancer and severe malnutrition…and an 18-month old baby. She was 29 and looked 80. We diagnosed liver cancer, heart failure, HIV on several unsuspecting individuals, pneumonia, and kidney failure in addition to the basic high BP, diabetes, and asthma cases. We averaged a patient every 5 minutes and still couldn’t keep up with the line of patients going down the hall, some standing, some sprawled on the floor every which way. It makes me wonder what on earth they see in the ER. I guess I’ll find out next week, since that’s where I’m headed!

My overall impressions after the first week? I have many conflicting feelings. In some ways it’s completely depressing to see so much suffering all in one place. At one point I looked down the line of patients, many of whom were young adults or had babies on their backs, and felt a wave of complete shock that any one even survives to middle-age! I can hardly express the feelings of…almost ‘survivors’ guilt’ to think of what an easy life I have, through no merit of my own. What did I do to deserve being a privileged American, and how often have I complained about my doctor running 30 minutes late?

Then I also feel a bit of inspiration at just how strong these people are, to keep on going, to figure out how to make life work in these conditions, and to have joy in the midst of such difficulty. They appreciated even the mediocre care we gave them, and they smiled at us, and the kids played peek-a-boo with me. They’re not wallowing in self-pity or feelings of injustice, they’re just making it one day at a time as best they can, and there’s a beauty in that. Evidence of an inner strength that I doubt many of us would find, were the tables turned.

I'm a dork

2010-08-19T05:16:00.000-07:00

So I have a nice, newsy blog update to tell you all about my first week at the central hospital here, saved on my computer at home where I can't post it instead of on the laptop here in the mission office where I can post it. Guess that was a wasted trip over here! But such is life when you're suddenly so busy you can hardly remember your first name!

The kids started back to school on Tuesday (yeah!) and they're doing fairly well. They love their teachers, they seem to have a good mix of classmates, but that 7am start time has knocked us all for a loop again and we're dragging by about 2pm (me especially) and having melt-downs over which play shirt to wear (mostly Ethan, but I wouldn't put it past me!).

The hospital is do-able, but I'm really worn out. Part of it is the pure number of hours I suddenly find myself working...from teaching 1 hour a day, to summer break, to suddenly being gone 7am-4:45pm! Part of it is the emotional stress of seeing the suffering and the lack of available treatments and the limitations people live with on a daily basis. And some of it is the stress of being the 'outsider' who doesn't have a clue what's going on around me because everything is in rapid-fire Chichewa and all the systems are different than what I'm used to. So I mostly stand there and feel like a total moron who can't get an IV started or figure out how in the world they calculated that drug dosage! I don't mean to imply that people are rude to me...they're just enjoying laughing WITH me (?) that the azungu (foreign) nurse with a masters' degree can't read their charts and chicken-scratch shorthand! My job is to be humble, let them laugh and teach me, and get through these 4 weeks!!! Some days I've figured out how to leave at noon, and those are the really good days! But I'm almost down 2 weeks, which means half-way, so I should keep my chin up and realize it's going by quickly.

Health-wise, I'm feeling fine. I'm large and waddle-y and feel quite conspicuous at the hospital as everyone stares wide-mouthed, but really I'm doing well. And I will post the other blog as soon as I remember to put it on this computer!

ABC Clinic

2010-08-06T05:18:00.000-07:00

It's been forever since I wrote, and I'm sorry about that. Life has trucked on and we're all doing well, though summer has felt busier than I expected it to. Chad had only 2 weeks off before the next term started, so he's been hard at work, first developing the courses, then preparing for them, and now teaching them!

After getting back from South Africa, I was able to finalize things with our leadership and with ABC clinic, and we've worked out an agreement where I will see patients 3 mornings a week. The clinic is part of a mission compound that includes another seminary, the school which Anya and Ethan attend, and the community clinic. The clinic serves anyone for a small fee, but it won't be as busy as the local hospital clinics, where the services are free. I shadowed a doctor there for 2 days and it's remarkably similar to where I worked in the US--with the additional potential diagnoses of malaria, yellow fever, dengue fever, cholera, typhoid....arrrgh! I've been cramming through the tropical medicine sections of my texts, but it doesn't feel like it's sticking yet. It'll probably be a stressful few weeks of getting used to it all.

And one of the scariest things for me is that Malawi is requiring me to 'work' at the Central Hospital for 4 weeks before they'll grant me a local license! There's another American nurse who will be doing it with me, and we agree we'd sure love a dose of Xanax to get through it, because it's going to be tough! I am thankful they've decided to license me through the nursing board rather than the medical board, so I'll be 'working' as a nurse on the units rather than as an attending provider. The doc I know who had to do this was basically set loose on the units to manage everything while the other docs took the days off! And nurses here are allowed/expected to do so much less than in the US...there's really much less chance of me killing someone this way! But the wards are just big rooms with tons of beds, no infection control, and who knows what else. The patients are only fed what their families bring them each day. It'll be an eye-opening experience, to be sure. Please pray for me over the next 4 weeks--it all starts Monday morning!

South Africa

2010-07-15T09:05:00.000-07:00

Well, Ethan and I are not in Africa anymore. I mean, we are physically…South Africa is technically on the continent, but it’s like no Africa I’ve ever known. We spent 4 hours cruising one of the malls here. Did you catch that? “one of…” There are more than one!!! And they’re real malls. Like, way more real than we even had in Yakima! I had to choose from a massive selection of restaurants. I bought a couple of things I needed—a 220v coffee maker and tea kettle, a jacket (who knew I would need one in Africa?), and some treats for the kids. South Africa manufactures their own brands of most things we have in the US, so there aren’t a ton of US product names. I did see Grape Nuts, and was tempted, but I couldn’t stomach the $11 price tag! But everything else is so much cheaper than in Malawi, because what we have there is imported from here, at $6.80 per gallon of gas plus import tax!
Yesterday we ate at McDonalds. I wasn’t a big McD’s fan in the US (please, don’t revoke my citizenship for that confession!) but let me tell you…after 18 months, the fries really did taste that good! Ethan was just amazed at finding a toy in his happy meal box.
Today I ate at “Mug & Bean”, South Africa’s answer to Panera Bread—and an impressive answer, at that. I had the most amazing chicken wrap with fresh cucumbers, avocado, lettuce, and a delicious sauce, and to drink? A vanilla late. Those of you in the US have NO idea just how breath-taking it was to savor those flavors again! I even let Ethan run across to the video arcade (!) by himself so I could revel in it a little longer.
But, it’s not the US either. I’ve had my share of blank looks from people at stores who have no idea what I’m saying (though we’re both speaking a form of English!). The doctors offices have all been impressive, and the OB did a 15 minute ultrasound so thoroughly that he counted each finger and each toe and measured the different ventricles in the brain…and recorded the whole scan and his commentary describing everything on a dvd he sent home with me! I’m so excited Chad will be able to see it all as well, since he couldn’t be with me. And won’t baby love watching that someday?!?!?!?! I did have to giggle, however, when the nurse handed me a urine dip-stick and told me to “go wee-wee on this and bring it back”. Wee-wee???? And then carry the dripping stick back down the hall??? And I thought it was embarrassing to carry the cup!
I’ve decided South Africa is a nice place to visit, recharge, fulfill some food-related cravings, bask in the order and cleanliness of everything, and then head on home. As much as I’m enjoying it, I’m not ready to move here—I miss Malawi’s laid-back attitude, friendly people, and lack of pretentions. And it feels good to miss Malawi.

Thanksgiving in July

2010-07-13T11:49:00.000-07:00

Anya and Ethan loved the leaves...Isaac, not so much!

I was already feeling rather 'fall-ish' with the chill in the air and the overcast skies. But when all the leaves fell off the trees and the kids started playing in the leaf piles, I really started to crave Yakima apple cider! And apparently I'm not the only one...for our next mission dinner to say goodbye to 3 families who are leaving, we've decided to have a thanksgiving-themed dinner. You can't get good turkey here anyway, so we're doing roasted chicken and all the fixings. Doesn't that sound good??? I can hardly wait! See, there are some good things about having your seasons all messed up--two Thanksgiving feasts! Now, if only I can figure out how to press cider from these South African apples...

End of school festivities

2010-07-13T11:30:00.000-07:00

This is really more for a few photos than anything witty or clever. I'm in Joburg, South Africa right now, and internet is amazing-fast compared to what we're used to, so I'm going to try and post several things that have been on my mind, and hopefully update some photos!

I also wanted to give a shout-out to my long-suffering mother who tried so hard to please me in the area of home-made clothes when I was young. I never gave her enough credit, or enough appreciation. And I never realized it until my own daughter needed a 'Queen's coronation gown' with 2 days notice! Payback is sweet, isn't it mom?

Anya as 'Queen Lucy' from Narnia...thanks to leftover curtain material and a frantic day of sewing

Zomba mountain

2010-06-22T01:21:00.000-07:00

We went 5 hours south to the towns of Blantyre and Zomba a few weeks ago. Chad had an all-day meeting on Saturday, and then we visited with two seminary students on Sunday. Overall it was a great trip...definitely true-to-Africa, but good. The first night we stayed at a guesthouse which was not so cheap, so we had higher expectations than we should have. They wouldn't let us make reservations over the phone ("just come, you'll find plenty of rooms") and of course there were plenty of rooms...just none with more than one bed at our price range! They upgraded us to a 'nicer' room for free, and that gave us a twin and a full--for the 5 of us! So Ethan and I slept in the full, Chad got the twin, and Anya slept on the floor covered in coats because they didn't have any extra blankets. Isaac was in the pack-and-play, at least for the first 3 minutes. Then he discovered he could climb out of it, so it was the three of us in the bed. Then Anya woke up in the middle of the night swearing that she could hear a "sound like a hedgehog" and that her big toe was strangely wet. Whether or not anything was really there was not determined, but I certainly wasn't going to make her suffer through the possibility of a rodent licking her feet!!! So it ended up the 4 of us in a full, with Chad snoring blissfully in his twin! The sacrifices of motherhood!! The next morning we bathed in a great shower but shared the one towel they provided and Chad headed off to his meeting while we drove up Zomba mountain to explore.

We had a great time--feeding horses as a stables, playing at the dam, exploring the trout farm (and getting into biting ants), and drinking hot cocoa at the summit. I even bought some passion fruit and mountain raspberrys (which, sadly, turned to raspberry wine in the car before we could get home and clean them. Talk about tragedy!!!). It was amazingly beautiful. Then we stayed the night with missionary friends in Blantyre.

Sunday we visited with the students at their church and had a nice time. Then we had to visit them in their homes, of course. Only they had been expecting us on Saturday instead of Sunday so they had prepared a feast for us on Saturday and had nothing left to serve us on Sunday! We felt terrible. Of course they borrowed an orange kool-aid-type drink and bread and margarine to give us, and we had a nice time visiting--except that we had to drive home before dark, so we didn't have time to stop for lunch (no such thing as a fast-food drive through here!) We got home at 7pm and the kids hadn't eaten anything since breakfast except for the bread and a peanut butter sandwich a missionary saint insisted I pack up Saturday night. All things considered, they did very well! But I'm not sure I'll ever get used to traveling in Africa with kids. It took a few days to recover!

"Winter Break" has begun

2010-06-18T01:58:00.000-07:00

It's quite cold here, on the second day of 'winter break'! Will I ever get used to this? BBC reported that the penguin population in South Africa has been hit hard by the 'cold snap' which has wiped out a large number of the baby chicks. If the penguins are dying of cold in South Africa, something is wrong!!! Anyway, we're surviving with our wool slippers and sweatshirts.

Day 1 went well--all 3 kids slept in until 7am which was blissful. Of course, this morning they were up at the usual 5am. Why didn't anyone tell me that the parenting lack-of-sleep extended PAST when they start sleeping through the night??? What I wouldn't do for an IHOP or Sherry's to send my morning-loving family to!

We don't have any major plans...Chad only has 3 weeks off between his terms. My class and the kids' school start up in mid-August again, so we have a little more time to enjoy each other's company. We'll try to get to the Lake, I think, and maybe a small game-park that's not too far. Other than that, I have grand plans for several projects to do with the kids, some structured time for school-review (they were sent home with a 'winter packet' to complete before next school year), and we'll see how that goes!

Anya finished 2nd grade well, winning an award for 'Most Enthusiastic Student' and for having the second highest Accelerated Reading score in the grade. She spent the last week of school sobbing over the fact that her beloved teacher is returning to England for good. I'm afraid we've brought a very tender-hearted soul who can't handle good-byes to a place where good-byes are the norm. Poor thing--and it's only just beginning! I'm sure we'll get a bill for hours of counseling someday!

Ethan finished...pretty well. He's lucky he's so cute and loving--his teacher put up with a lot of redirecting and reminding! We're praying already for his teacher next year, that he/she is given extra doses of patience and compassion.

I'll try to get some photos from the end-of-the-year celebrations posted soon. Hope you are all enjoying the heat!

Pumpelly baby #4

2010-05-30T23:33:00.000-07:00

I've realized from some e-mails and comments, that I have not officially made it clear that YES, baby #4 is on the way! I put it in our monthly prayer letter, but many of you are not on that e-mail list. If you aren't and would like to be, please e-mail me at pumpellys@gmail.com and I'll add you!

So yes, baby #4 (and I'm reasonably certain the LAST) is on the way. I'm due Nov 12th, so I'm about 15 weeks and already far too big for my liking (I have an outtie already!). But I'm feeling fine and the kids are excited and hoping for a girl.

Everyone has been asking about delivery plans, so I'll tell you what I know right now. A month before I'm due I'll fly down to South Africa where the medical care is top-notch. I have no concerns at all about delivering there. Chad and the kids will follow closer to the due date. I am preparing myself for a C-section again, since Anya was born that way for being breech (even though the boys were both born naturally). Then I will have to stay in South Africa until the birth certificate is available and then we apply for a passport...they say to expect 4-6 weeks for that process. Chad and the 3 older kids will come back to get back into school and I'll stay with the baby until his/her passport is ready. The mission has a guesthouse suite all set up for people like us. Plus some friends are due just 2 days before me so we'll all be there together. I'm sure the older kids (and Chad!) will miss me while we're still down there waiting for the passport, but I think it'll all be ok. With cable TV, high-speed internet, malls and movie theaters, I'm going to feel like I'm on vacation--with a newborn baby!

Hiking the hills

2010-05-24T00:05:00.000-07:00

We like to get out on the weekends, let the kids get some exercise. Malawi has some great hiking areas. One not too far from us is called Bunda rock. We'd heard that people go up to the top all the time, often spending the night and praying. "It's an easy hike" we were told. So we packed up the kids, the rock-climbing gear to let the kids practice rapelling, and lunch, and headed out. We obviously did not get enough information before we left, because Bunda rock is actually lots of tall rocks with lots of places to climb with lots of local villages surrounding it! We did out best, but clearly picked the wrong place to start climbing!

Chad was loaded down with ropes and lunch, Miriam had Isaac strapped to her back, and Anya and Ethan quickly got tired of the 40 children (yes, we counted, and there were literally 40) who attached themselves to us and followed us everywhere, pulling Anya's blond hair and laughing at Ethan. As they laughed, Ethan got grumpier, and they thought it was funnier, until poor Ethan was sobbing about things like the grass poking his legs too hard (meanwhile, the kids are all scampering up the mountain barefooted!)

With the rains so recently ended, the elephant grass is exceedingly tall, so we were actually pushing through grass taller than Chad--I suppose I should have been more understanding of Ethan getting freaked out over walking through grass twice as tall as he is! We got most of the way up the mountain when Ethan got stung twice by some kind of bee, and it was all over. Between me panting away trying to carry Isaac on the back and my growing belly out front, plus Ethan melting down, plus the grasses making things impossible, we turned around and headed home where we ate in peace at last. Sometimes our grand ideas work out great. Other times...not so much

The strangest sight

2010-05-23T23:54:00.000-07:00

Last Sunday we were driving to church when Anya pointed out a very strange sighting--a man in nothing but boxers standing outside watering his driveway (to keep the dust down). Not the kind of thing we see everyday. Now, if only that was the strangest thing we'd seen that week...

the day before we had gone to a national monument to walk through the botanical gardens surrounding it. As we were minding our own business, a bus drove up and off-loaded a group of nuns. They arranged themselves on the steps of the monument, and it became clear they were about to shoot a music video! Strange enough, huh? So we watched them sing their songs and do their choreographed swaying that is so common here. But then they were ready to do their second song, and of COURSE a costume change is in order, right? You can't shoot two videos with them wearing the same clothes! So the whole group of them stripped their tops off and changed shirts...right there on the steps of the monument, in the middle of town, on a Saturday afternoon. And you know what??? We were the only people who thought that 25 nuns in their bras and skirts was an unusual sight at all!!!! I captured the nuns singing, but thought I'd spare you the costume-change...you'll just have to take my word for it!

Photos from Anya's village stay

2010-05-23T23:30:00.000-07:00

I know this is late, but we've finally got a faster connection (by our standards, mind you!) at the mission office. I thought you might enjoy seeing some photos from the village.

1. our host family's house (he's the village chief's last-born son)

2. Anya playing ball with all the kids

3. the village

4. the children getting water (used for bathing, cooking, and drinking

In Whom do we trust?

2010-05-05T02:41:00.000-07:00

In the old days of mission-work, missions used to use our abundant financial resources to fund this and pay for that, and subsidize everything. We thought we were doing good, helping our brothers and sisters, spreading equality and opportunity...

Only what we didn't realize is that, instead, we were creating dependency of the local churches on our resources. Think of the stereotyped "welfare mentality" and multiply it by 100. We created the motto, "In the missionaries we trust" because whenever there was a need, we met it. No one had to pray to God or trust in His provisions--they just had to ask the missionary or the volunteer team! Churches didn't reach their neighbors because that's what the missionaries did. They didn't plant new churches, because they couldn't afford to build them a new building and put a roof on it like the missionaries had done for them. They didn't hold training seminars for church leaders because they couldn't pay for everyone's transportation costs like the missionaries always did. We saw stagnant church growth and a lack of local buy-in because we had made it seem that abundant resources were a necessary part of starting anything new.

We're now trying to slowly fix that problem, to show that communities can raise money on their own, that when God is trusted to provide, God does provide through unique and amazing ways. But in order to teach them that, we have to avoid being the answer to every problem. And that's not easy to do. We're Americans, and Americans like to solve problems, especially when the solution is easily within our means. It's ultimate tough-love, and the churches don't always believe it's best for them. We can appear mean and stingy compared to the missionaries who came before us.

This issue has really been hit home for us the last few weeks, because the Seminary is struggling financially due to lack of support from the Baptist Convention (due to their own lack of funds because the local churches are all so poor there's nothing to give to the Convention!) The Seminary has had to get stricter about students paying their fees--before, students were allowed to attend even if they hadn't paid. No longer! And the students are scrambling to raise funds. Most didn't believe the Seminary was serious, so they arrived on campus without school fees and were shocked to be denied access to their dorm rooms! It was so painful to watch them struggle to raise funds, worry about where the money would come from, knowing that we could easily pay many of their fees and never notice the money was missing. I had only 5 students out of 20 on the first day of class. But slowly they trickled in, and by the 5th day, all 20 students had raised enough of the fees to be admitted back! God provided for them in many and unusual ways, but it was done without us or the mission bailing them out. The lessons learned in that far outweighed the discomfort it gave us to see them struggling, and it far outweighed the discomfort they felt in struggling (whether they believe that or not!).

The issue is far from over, since the second installment of fees is due next week (and many still do not have those fees) and it will continue to be a struggle for the mission and for local believers alike. But I wanted to give you a little picture of some of what we face in fostering healthy dependency on God and preventing unhealthy dependency on Westerners. Please pray that God will continue to show Himself to be Jehovah Jirah--God who Provides. And also that God would break down the spirit of entitlement that makes some students feel they shouldn't have to work to get money for fees, that God should provide them with a 'sponsor' to take care of all costs since they are going to be serving God. And pray for us to wisely discern when we should help and when we should avoid helping to do the most good and least harm, despite our good intentions.

The saga of Blackboots continues...

2010-05-05T02:27:00.000-07:00

So the guy came and got the goat, lovingly named Blackboots by Anya, and we managed to send him off with no tears shed from the kids. Story over, or so we thought. As we were driving out of the gate on Thursday, who should ride up but Blackboots, securely tied to the man's bicycle. Chad leaned out the window, told him we could not deal with a goat on any day but Friday, and off we drove. Imagine our surprise when we arrived home later that day and found none other than Blackboots penned up in our back yard again! To appease the kids' cries, we secured the gates and unchained Jake, the Rottweiler, to see if we could get him to 'adjust' to a new creature. All seemed to be going well so Chad went off for his afternoon lecture while I settled into grading the first exams. All of a sudden I hear the most horrible bleating, children screaming, and then our houseworker yelling. I start to run outside, then realize what must have happened, and I ran back for a weapon. All I could find was a carved walking stick, but it had a good knob on the end. So out I ran, vaulted the fence (in a most graceful bound I'm sure) to find Jake with the goat securely in his jaws and murder in his eyes. He's a big dog, over 100 pounds, and he's a serious guard dog. That goat was going to be toast! The kids were screaming, our houseworker Bambo Phiri was valiantly trying to save the goat but is terrified of Jake himself. So I started the beating--whacking the snot out of that blasted dog, and finally got him to let go. Bambo Phiri grabbed the goat and I chased Jake out of the yard and rechained him. I was covered in mud, panting from the vigorous beating I'd just given, the kids were traumatized, and the goat was amazingly no worse for his near-death experience.

In talking it through with the kids later, helping them understand why we simply can not keep Blackboots, a light-bulb went off in Ethan's eyes. In all seriousness, he had used all his best problem-solving skills to come up with a solution...

"We should slaughter JAKE, then Bambo Phiri's family can eat half of him and we can eat the other half, and then we can keep Blackboots as a pet!!!!" And who can argue with the logic??? Yet we chose to be conventional, and sent Blackboots packing the next day with strict instructions to the owner and to our workers NOT to allow another goat into the yard without us being there and approving it.

Oh, the things we never dreamed of having to deal with!

Official Lecturers!

2010-04-27T11:13:00.000-07:00

I know I've been silent since Easter, but don't let that fool you into thinking things have been calm! We're now in week 2 of the semester, and we're both finding teaching to be much more
tiring than we imagined (and all the teachers say AMEN!). Our time of language study was quite luxuriously flexible. We could fit our studies around errands and kids' schedules and whatever came up. No longer! That's been the hardest adjustment...that and having to have all 5 of us ready to be out the door for the day by 7am! Did I mention I'm a serious anti-morning person??

But we are having a blast with the students and with teaching. I was quite nervous about it at first, but I'm enjoying it now. I think my students are too, but then it's awfully hard to get an honest eval from them! Chad's doing a great job with his classes also, and we're feeling great being around the students more.

Of course we haven't paid our phone bill or our water bill this month, we routinely run out of milk and bread and have to make desperate runs to the store (a dangerous thing in Africa, where you never know if the store will actually have what you need on any given day!), and yesterday a man dropped off a goat to see if we wanted to buy it. Only we weren't there, so they penned it up until we came home, and then the man forgot to come back for it. We didn't want a goat--at least not on a Monday when we're running busy all week! So we had to tie it up in the gardening shed so our Rot wouldn't eat it for dinner, where it stayed all night and pooped all over everything. This morning the man came back for his money--I think both he and our workers were quite disappointed their little ploy to convince us to buy a goat didn't work! Anya had already named it, of course, so now she and Ethan are ganging up on us to buy them a pet goat. You know, since we don't have enough going on! So life continues to constantly surprise us, and I'm terribly tired from the busy schedule and early mornings (though it could have something to do with being pregnant and having a 16-month-old too). But we're happy, and we're so thankful to be doing what we came out here to do--at last!

The best Easter ever

2010-04-08T23:15:00.000-07:00

So we had some challenges on Christmas, if you'll remember. Not one of the highlights in my past year, though I do enjoy laughing about it at times. But I tell you...Easter was wonderful! It started out slow, with trouble finding a goat. We see and hear them all the time, so we were totally bewildered at how impossible they were to find when we actually wanted to buy one. Plus we were trying to get the best price and passed up a couple early on thinking we could do better. We ended up not getting one until 1pm on Sunday (and paying too much...needing something automatically raises the price--they can smell the desperation, I swear!). Everyone had arrived around noon--all 21 people, and we visited and the 12 kids played on the new playground Chad built. I was so relieved when Chad arrived with the goat--I had no idea how I was going to feed everyone otherwise! The men went to work killing, skinning, and cutting up the goat while us women made greens, salad, goat stew, rice and nsima, the staple food here. I butchered the Chichewa language trying to talk to the women who spoke almost no English, and they laughed at my mistakes, at my poor attempt to shred cabbage with a knife, and at the fact that I only had bought 12 tomatoes, apparently not nearly enough. Who knew???

At 2pm I made peanut butter sandwiches for the kids, who were not complaining but I knew had to be starving, since no one had eaten since breakfast. They loved drawing on the driveway with chalk, and I sent them into the yard to find marshmallow-roasting sticks. As soon as the meat was done roasting, we toasted marshmallows--a new experience for them, and one that was a definite success! I called it 'roasted candy' since I had no other words to describe it in Chichewa.

At 4:30 the food was finally all done, and we sat down for a feast. It's a good thing people hadn't eaten all day--there was so much food it was amazing. As amazing as the amount of food on each person's plate!!! Everyone feasted until nothing more could fit in the stomach--picture the end of a very satisfying Thanksgiving dinner, only with us in camp chairs sitting under Flame trees in the African evening. Ahhh, it was next to heaven!

Chad gave a great 'speech' (in Chichewa!) about how much we appreciate each of the families who were there, and then they gave a speech about how much they appreciate us (I think--I was catching every 3 or 4 words, but between the words I did get and their big smiles, I think it was positive!) We had to bypass the egg hunt because of time, so we just gave the kids some candy and stickers and Chad drove them all home since night had fallen. As soon as we brought all the dishes in, the power went off, so we had to save the clean up for the next day. That gave Chad and me time to sit in our living room in the candle-light, thinking just how blessed we are to be living this life!

No use crying...

2010-04-01T01:59:00.000-07:00

I made a delicious coffee-cake the other day, with cinnamon and coconut and melted chocolate drizzled over it. Anya wanted to help, so she pulled over the wash-tub to stand on so she could reach better. No problem until Isaac found he could climb up too, and his reach suddenly lengthened significantly. I had just poured a cup of milk out of the pitcher in order to make it sour with lemon juice, and Isaac's quick hands nearly got the cup. I breathed a sigh of relief as I grabbed it just in time and moved it beyond his grasp. But as I did so, I felt a shower on my bare feet, heard a waterfall flowing, and realized baking this cake was going to take much longer than I had planned. Isaac had poured out the entire 2Liters of milk all over the kitchen!!! In my efforts to save the cup, I sacrificed the pitcher. The clean-up was rediculous--I had to move the stove, move the fridge, wash dishes from the cupboards covered in milk-splatter. And of course that 2-Liters of milk was the last we had, so to finish dinner I had to go to the store and buy more, only the first store I tried didn't have any so I had to go to another one. But such is life in Africa. Instead of crying, I grabbed the camera, a response I'm not sure our house-helper fully understood!

Wii-ligion

2010-04-01T01:55:00.000-07:00

I knew that Ethan was enthralled with the Wii our friends recently got, and every time we visit he begs to play. But I hadn't realized it had gotten to such a drastic level until the other day.

Ethan came running into the laundry room as I folded clothes, singing, "I just can't wait to get to heaven, to get to heaven, to get to heaven..." I asked him what he was most looking forward to in heaven:

"Playing golf with Jesus" was his answer, which surprised me since none of us play golf here on earth!

"Really?" I asked him, and he smiled sweetly and answered,

"Well, yeah, if he has a Wii"

A Carnivore's birthday

2010-03-09T22:59:00.001-08:00

Developing a budget here has been a challenge, because the things I assume will be expensive aren't, and the things that shouldn't be, are! It's all so confusing. For example, yesterday I had a $7 small chicken wrap and a $6 small bundle of grapes (fresh from South Africa--they were so good, and it's been a whole year since I last had grapes!) and yet I picked up Ethan's Claritin for $3. I saw some tortillas in the store the other day: $14 for 10, which is why we make our own!

But another splurge I decided was worth it was for Chad's birthday. I found a 2.3kg steak--that's just over 5 pounds!!!) for $20. What carnivore could resist??? So to celebrate birthday #34, he had a 5 pound steak with baked potatoes, rice, steamed veggies, rolls, and Duncan Heinz brownies for desert. We all shared the steak--and it still lasted for that dinner, 2 breakfasts, and 3 lunches! Who says we're suffering too much out here?

Language Evaluation

2010-03-09T22:38:00.000-08:00

On Tuesday, we found out our evaluation would take place on Saturday. I had been so ready to have it over with I didn't even think I was nervous, but then I wrote it on the calendar and the stomach cramps began! We reviewed the material we would be responsible for with our language helper, and it seemed to go ok with him. We'd heard wonderful things about the woman who would administer the eval. And we were reminded several times: it's an evaluation, not an examination. Just to see where we are in language so we can plan for our future study where it's needed. Somehow that didn't calm my nerves any!

Saturday morning came and the kids had an uncanny way of knowing something was up. Could have been the terror in my eyes, I suppose, but regardless, they did everything possible to increase our anxiety level! After a rough morning of fighting and ignoring and pestering each other, we got them to a friend's house and we drove over to where our 'eval' would be. I burst into tears as soon as we drove up, despite my best efforts to keep it bottled up. Why do I have to be a stress-cryer???

I went first, and I held it together during the eval. She did a lot more role-playing than I was expecting, so I wasn't prepared for several things: 'lets say I'm a bus driver and you want a ticket to go to the lake--start talking' or 'I'm a plumber and you call me to see if I can fix a leak in your toilet'. Yikes! And then she asked me to pray, and let me tell you, it's not easy to pray in another language!!! It feels irreverent to stumble through prayer and say the wrong things to God, somehow! She also asked how I hired people (to hire= kulolemba) and I thought she asked what I did on Mondays (monday= lolemba)! It wasn't until later when I asked Chad why she picked Monday that I realized my error. I'm sure she was quite confused by my answer! =)

After it was all over I broke down again and cried for a good hour, with my brain reliving every question and what I said and what I knew how to say but forgot to use! I'm so neurotic that way. It comes from my desire to be perfect and to be in control of everything...a disastrous combination for learning a foreign language!!!

Our boss called not much later to say we had both passed with excellent scores: I've met the standard I have to have by the end of our first term, so I'm officially 'home-free' and Chad has just a little more to go (his standard is just higher--he's actually speaking much better than I am). The irony is that we should be excited, but we both know we're not speaking as well as we want to be, we can't communicate all the things we want to say, we can't follow a sermon in Chichewa yet, and so it's a bittersweet victory. Now the challenge is finding the time, the energy, and the opportunity to keep learning more, with our time at the Seminary (where the teaching is all in English) increasing.

The Rains

2010-02-11T04:47:00.000-08:00

The rains have arrived in all their glory. As the photo indicates, it was a welcome arrival to say the least. Green grass, corn fields, and flowers have sprung up everywhere. Of course, instead of dust we now have mud, but even that can't damper our spirits too much.

I am amazed at how things grow anywhere and everywhere here. Every unoccupied yard has become a corn field. Alleys between houses, what used to be rubbish heaps, the berms beside major roads...they're all corn fields now. Since the main food is made from corn-meal, these fields are essential to survival. So far, it appears it should be a good harvest in October. I pray it is: our house helper had to take a loan of 4-month's salary to pay for the fertilizer in hopes of being able to feed his family for the whole year on his crop!

This time is called the 'season of hunger' because last year's maize is running out about now, and they aren't able to harvest this year's yet. Petty crime escalates as desperation increases. There is a steady flow of beggars at our gate, asking for money and food. The bread, peanut butter and tea we provide our workers for tea is the first meal they have, and they will eat 1 more meal each day, but probably not 2. Only the very young, the very old, and those with chronic illness are dying of starvation around the country, but everywhere we see hunger and malnutrition. It's a haunting time: the rains are falling and everything is growing, yet it's the hardest time for most people. The wealth of color is deceptive as they must wait for the dreary brown of the dry season before the shriveled corn stalks can be harvested. It's somehow fitting for Africa, the land of contradictions: beauty and hardship, green growth and hunger, sun baked fields and another year's sustenance.

Parenting Genius Backfires

2010-01-24T05:25:00.000-08:00

Our dogs are always chewing on things and jumping up, and I've read all the books on being a good doggy-mom, so I got the spray bottle to 'humanely' discipline them. And it works!!! Gotta love a blast of cold water in the face to make your will known. SOOOOOOO....

Since it works with dogs, couldn't it perhaps work with a strong-willed 1-year old? Better than smacking hands or flicking ears, surely! So we've been having trouble with Isaac screaming, and I mean ear-piercing screams, whenever he wants something like another bite or a drink. It makes for a very noisy dinner, not to mention a splitting headache. So last night, in order to more fully enjoy our Ranch-marinated Tilopia filets with rice, I got the spray bottle out. As soon as he discovered he likes fish, the screeching began. I wiped out the spray bottle, ready to withstand his anger until it worked it's magic and changed his behavior, and gave it a squirt. I would do anything to have captured on video the look on his face. It was truly priceless...a definate $10,000 winner on AFV! What I was not counting on is just how funny that look would be, and the fact that the other two angels at the table might not be able to contain themselves. They tried to hold in the giggles, but it didn't work. And Isaac is most definitely Chad's son, so as soon as he realized he was causing laughter...he squawked again. So I sprayed him, which sent the older kids into fits of hysteria, and Chad lost his self-control as well. Isaac clearly made the connection: I scream, I get sprayed, everyone laughs. So he did it again, and again, and again. In hind-sight, perhaps I should have stopped the spraying if I wanted to salvage it's use as punishment, but I didn't, so there Isaac sat, water dripping off his ears, chin, and nose, belly laughing between screams, as Anya, Ethan, and Chad (oh, alright, and me) tried to not fall off our chairs. It had to be one of the funniest half hours ever (yes, it went on that long--I'm nothing if not persistent!)

It may not have been my most effective parenting break-through, but I'm quite sure we all digested our dinners a little bit better for all the laughter!

Life after Christmas

2010-01-18T11:52:00.000-08:00

It may seem that I’ve been silent since our fateful Christmas day, but I assure you we have not been still! We were able to get away to the lake for a wonderful 3 day-2 night stay in a ‘beach-front’ villa complete with kitchen, living room, and house-helper who washed our dishes and swept up the sand the kids brought in. LOVELY! The place was situated between two villages, so our beach-play was curiously watched by hundreds of kids and not a few women washing clothes and men bathing, but that’s what Africa’s all about, after all!

After an uneventful time, we drove home, deciding to stop at a small game park along the way. We got all of 1 km into the park when Chad stopped the car, and said in all seriousness, “If I go another foot, I’m going to get stuck in the mud. If I reverse out of here, I’m going to get stuck in the mud. What should I do?” We opted for reversing…and we got stuck in the mud. To give him the due credit, Chad did an amazing job and almost made it before the mud finally won. But there we were, stuck. The last people to come through the park had done so a week before, so we weren’t counting on much traffic! Given the vacation we were on, we were in flip-flops, shorts, and had no tools. After rigging chains out of a piece of rope (“In point of fact it did not [work], but I’m convinced the theory is sound”…Ghost and the Darkness) and trying to push, we found a number to the game warden and our cell phone had a signal. The first man to help arrived on a motorcycle with no tools. We asked him to go back to get a shovel (!). A second man arrived…on a bicycle, with no tools. We asked him to go back for a board (!!). Chad was covered in mud, feeling frustrated, and said, “It couldn’t get any worse!” to which Anya said, “Uh, dad? It could be raining.” I also couldn’t resist pointing out that at least the game-park didn’t have any lions, as we watched the greater kudu and bushbuck walk across the road behind us!

Anyway, we got out after only 2 hours, and were none the worse for the wear after a good long shower. We got unpacked and laundry done just in time to find out that our permanent house was almost ready to move into! We just had to pack up the one room for the family who is moving out (they are in the US right now). So for 2 days we packed up their things, then we just had to move their things to the storage barn, clean the house, and move our things in! Since there was nothing driving us but our own excitement at being in our real home, we did it in a lazy 5 days. Then today we did virtually nothing, leaving the cleaning of the old house for tomorrow. The dirt’s not going anywhere, I figure.
But we’re in. Unpacked, things on the walls, and loving it to death! The yard is amazing, the wood floors shine, the kitchen is spacious, my washer and dryer can both plug in INDOORS, and I have rose bushes! We could not be happier.

So that’s how we spent our Christmas vacation—enough playing around, time to get back to work!

A Christmas to forget

2009-12-27T05:56:00.000-08:00

Christmas day started out early (5:45!) but good. We had electricity and I knew where to find the coffee in our new kitchen, so what more do you need? Stockings were fun to open with the kids, they loved and appreciated their things, we went through the Christmas story, and then opened gifts. Thanks to a fantastic church partner who sent presents, the kids had things to open since we hadn't made it shopping what with moving. The few gifts we had brought with us from the US were wrapped in napkins and curtains because that's all we could find!

The day started to go South when I started cooking for the mission dinner. In a new kitchen and things only partially set-up, everything took longer. I finally got the dough made for orange spirals, got the piecrust baking, and started the pie filling. After stirring it for 45 minutes, I decided it simply was not going to solidify like it was supposed it, and only then did I realize the stovetop was not working. And neither was the oven any longer, and the curst was only half-cooked. Chad was walking the dogs, so when he came back he started to switch out the ovens (to move our old one in). But then he found the wiring problem, got the original one working again, and so I was back on track though sadly behind. The bread wasn’t rising properly, the pie wasn’t cooling fast enough…I finally jumped in the shower at 2:20 for our 2:00 lunch, forgetting to get the oven turned back on to cook the rolls. I didn’t realize everyone was waiting for us to arrive, which we did at almost 3, without the pie or the rolls! After filling our plates, I fed Isaac while Chad ran home to put the rolls in the oven. When he got back, I finished a few bites and ran back home to pull them out of the oven. And the bottoms were scorched. Apparently the new oven doesn’t cook so evenly. Yes, I went into Christmas-dinner-battle with an unproven oven, a mistake I won’t make again! I sat on the kitchen floor, oven mitt in one hand and charcoal rolls in the other, and sobbed. But the pie was cool, so I pulled myself together and headed back over. After a pleasant dinner, which I was almost too tired to fully enjoy, we headed home. But where were the keys??? Chad was sure I had misplaced them in my meltdown over the rolls, and I admit I had no memory of keys at all, except that the door was locked, so I had to have brought them out of the house! We tore the car apart, and in the frenzy, the Rottweiler jumped into the car, discovered the half-a-chocolate pie and ate all the real whipped cream off the top. Still no keys, so we climbed back into the car to see if they were at our friend’s house, and Ethan stepped in the remaining pie (yes, Chad had been planning on salvaging the chocolate part of the pie up until that point!). The keys were nowhere to be found, until Ethan and a friend remember that Ethan was playing in the car earlier, got frustrated with his friend, and threw the keys out the car window at him! Of course it’s pitch-African-dark by this time. Nonetheless, 11 adults and 2 kids donned head-lamps and flashlights and searched the area they swear the keys had to be, which, I’m sure, also happens to be the thickest grass in all of Lilongwe! The only other set of keys we knew of were inside the house since we had them both to move. And after 1-½ hours of fruitless searching…oh, did I mention the rose bushes all around? I have the scratches to remind me…we gave up. Miraculously, someone found another copy of the back door key and we were able to get in. On the drive home, the bowl of carrots slid over so the buttered carrots joined the smashed-in chocolate pie on the car floor.

It was 9pm, Isaac hadn’t had a nap and was screeching like a howler monkey at this point, and we were finished. I’m afraid to say we totally bombed the “real spirit of Christmas” this year. I was trying to find some spiritual lesson, or application I should have learned from this experience, but this is all I’ve come up with: some days just stink. I guess God’s gift is that when you fall into bed and think you can’t take anymore, you always wake up to a new day, and God’s mercies are “new every morning”. Today has been much better, despite the 4 loads of dishes I had to do to clean up from yesterdays’ kitchen-disasters! Our old stove is moved in, and this morning the keys were found in the exact spot we had all been looking. Of course, the other lesson to be learned is that we don’t have to do it all. I agreed to bring that food to dinner before we found out about moving. We had so much food no one would have even thought twice if I’d said I couldn’t bring the desserts after all. It was my own pride and stubbornness that insisted I act as if we hadn’t just done the impossible with moving in 3 days.

If there is a next time, which I hope there is not, I’ll know better about setting limits for myself. In the mean time, I need a nap…

The Worst Christmas Pageant Ever

2009-12-27T05:04:00.000-08:00

Oh wait. That wasn’t a pageant…that was our LIFE!!! This will go down in history as the craziest Christmas ever, and that’s saying a lot since I was recovering from childbirth and moving states and preparing to move continents last year!

A time-line may help explain.

Monday, 10am, we get the word that renters have been found for our house and they need to move in by Dec 27 (Sunday)! No boxes, no packing supplies, no problem. We’re pros at moving! We’ll clear out the apartment so it’s ready for our things to go in. Whoops, the keys to the big front door are locked up and the only one with access to them is out of town for 2 days.

Tuesday: we clear the (badly) furnished apartment by carrying everything out a narrow kitchen door, so it takes all day, and then start packing up our house in the 5 boxes we have, unpacking them in the new apartment so we can reuse those boxes for more trips. The truck isn't available because the keys are in the same place as the front door keys.

Wednesday: The truck is available, the front door keys are in hand, and 8 friends show up to help move everything big. The first load goes as smooth as silk. This is kind of crazy-fun! We always were gluttons for chaos. The second load…not so much. Just as we were driving into the apartment complex the skies opened and it POURED (did I mention our things were in a flat-bed truck? No tarp?) Amazingly, nothing was seriously damaged!

Thursday: We’re almost done, right? Only a few small things left. But those small things took FOREVER! We finally got it finished in time to make it to the mission carol-sing (I excused myself from bringing any food to contribute!) We got home at 9 and unpacked all the boxes from the living room, set up the tree (sans ornaments!) and wrapped Christmas presents, set up the stockings, and collapsed into bed. Can it really almost be Christmas??

The new apartment is nice. It's on the small side, with all 3 kids sharing a room and only 1 bathroom, but other than that, it's better in many ways. It has a fabulous shower (we've had to hold the nozzle in one hand since we arrived in April), ceiling fans (a blessing in this heat), great screens on the windows (far less mosquitoes munching us in the evening), and a fantastic yard with a long driveway for the kids to ride their bikes. We'll be here until our co-workers get moved up north to a new people group they'll be working with, and then we'll move into their old house. It could be anytime from 3 weeks to 3 months. And I'm ok with that timeline, as long as I have more than 3 days to move next time!

Grandpa Harold Kurtz

2009-12-20T08:27:00.000-08:00

I know I’m a little young to be considering my own mortality, but then again, I never thought I’d be contemplating my grandfather’s death. I can clearly remember telling a friend (in an awed tone) that he was 60 years old and still traveling the world. Now it’s my parents who are nearly 60 and grandpa passed away on Friday afternoon at age 84. And until last year, he was still traveling the world! He went on donkey treks through the Ethiopian bush, celebrated church growth with leaders in frozen Siberia, worked with untouchables in India and gypsies in Romania, with Korean and Peruvian believers…all with one simple dream. For every people, an indigenous church; for every church, a mission vision. He was a man with a vision, with principles, with passion, and I am so proud to have known him! The world lost a champion for responsible missions, for empowerment of the 3^rd World, for us in the 1^st World to take note of what they can teach us about faith, and family, and perseverance.

He has left behind a ‘clan’ who will miss him so very much--a wife, 6 kids, 23 grandkids, and 6 great-grandkids. And he taught each of us some important lessons:

1. Until death do us part means exactly what it says.
2. Do anything possible for family, but remember that everyone is family
3. There’s always room for one (or two, or three…) more
4. We are citizens of the whole world, and we should act like it
5. Popcorn makes a perfectly good dinner
6. Always make it 100 miles before breakfast

We know he's having the greatest time, worshiping the One he served his whole life. And we are so glad that his earthly struggle with the brain tumor, which robbed him of his ability to tell stories or give advice, is finally over. The Kurtz clan will never be the same with him gone, but we are all better people because of knowing him. We love you, grandpa!

It's beginning to look more like Christmas...

2009-12-17T22:30:00.000-08:00

As of the latest word, we're NOT moving after all, until February or so when our permanent house is available! So, with that in mind, the kids convinced us to get the tree out. By the time the 3rd ornament was up, Isaac had already pulled the whole tree over (thanks, Chad, for catching it just before it crushed him!). So, we got creative, and it now sits on top of our deep freezer. Rather odd vantage point, but you can actually see the ornaments better because they're at eye level! Perhaps we're starting a trend...

I almost didn't bring our ornaments, thinking they would be safer in storage and I would be so sad if we lost them all. But we all had so much fun rediscovering our favorites and recreating the memories of when we got each ornament, I was glad we did bring them after all. There was only one casualty, and it wasn't a critical loss. And bonus!!! Several of the ornaments were wrapped in American Kleenex, and you have NO idea just how soft that feels! (OK, yes, I did fold them up and put them in the closet to use on my next runny nose! The ornaments can go back in Malawian newspaper!)

The kids Christmas program was this week. Ethan was cast-typed as a...what else? An angel! He sang beautifully, and even sat still for the 2-hour production(!) Anya performed a dance with her ballet class. After I showed her this picture of her and her best friend (a Honduran-Scottish Malawian resident named Daniella!) she gave me a big hug and said, "Oh mom! I'm so beautiful!" Perhaps we don't need to work on the self-esteem part of life quite so much! But she was beautiful, and she danced so well! I can't tell you how happy I am to be able to offer the kids these little tastes of life back in the US, only with a distinct international flair!

The kids get out of school today, we'll make gingerbread houses (minus the molasses which you can't find here, so who knows how they'll taste!) over the weekend, singing of the Messiah on Tuesday, carol singing on Thursday, and a mission-wide Christmas dinner on Friday. Sounds like fun!!! We'll make it down to the lake the next week, to get the necessary annual Christmas-holiday-sunburn if we can find gas!

Swim Gala

2009-12-17T22:07:00.000-08:00

For the end-of-term sports, the kids had a 'swim gala' where the whole school competed over two days. Anya's started at 12 and finished at 5pm, and she raced in race 3 and race 65. Now is that cruel and unusual punishment for parents, or what??? I guess they wanted to make sure everyone stayed the whole time to cheer the other kids on! Anya came in 4th in her individual race and her team won 1st place in the relay.

Ethan raced 3 times (with his 'noodle'!) and came in 1st, 4th, and 2nd. Not too bad for someone scared of the 'big pool' 2 months ago!

Anya continues her swim lessons in January, and we're taking a break with Ethan. He'll still swim during PE once a week, and we may get a membership to the pool so we can all play there when the days get really hot. Who knew there would be such a great pool here in Lilongwe??

Look who's ONE!

2009-12-17T21:50:00.000-08:00

I’ve decided that 1 year old seems a lot older with your first baby than with your 3^rd. Compared to Anya’s independence and Ethan’s near-independence, Isaac hardly seems out of the baby stage. Of course Chad suggested having another baby so we could see exactly how much Isaac has grown, but I think I’m going to pass on that one right now!

One year ago we were stuck in the biggest snow-storm to hit Salem Oregon since the 1960’s. We were praising God’s timing in that Isaac was born and home from the hospital before we got snowed in, huddled around a pellet-burning stove to keep warm. We had no house, no jobs, no responsibilities, and a ton of unknowns looming ahead of us. Isaac was a tiny, eating-and-pooping machine.

Now here we are, sweltering in humid, tropical heat in Southern Africa, settled in semi-permanent housing, with responsibilities and a job as soon as we can learn a foreign language, a few less unknowns ahead…and Isaac is just a bigger eating-and-pooping machine, only now the diapers have to be washed out, not tossed!

Isaac is quite content to crawl, for the moment. He’ll stand if he doesn’t realize he’s doing it, and he’ll walk holding onto a hand. He has learned the finer art of screeching when he doesn’t get his way, but his laugh comes just as quickly. He wrestles with his dad and his brother, adores his big sister, and still thinks mom=lunch no matter what time of day or night. He loves smelling flowers and petting dogs and taking walks, splashing in the bath-tub, and riding on his nanny’s back in a sling.

He’s been through such a whirlwind in his first year of life, and he acts as though nothing unusual has happened. Then again, why shouldn’t he rest easy? He’s surrounded by people who love him, he’s clothed and fed and snuggled, he has things to play with and things to challenge him and force him to grow…what does he have to worry about? He’s not having to worry about bills, or stress over decisions, or get a job done, right? He just has to trust us to do right by him, which of course we’re going to do, despite our shortcomings. What a life, huh? That’s almost enough to be jealous about!

But here’s a thought: don’t we have a heavenly Father who is providing us the same stability and love and shelter no matter what life brings our way? The same guidance and direction and nurturing, if we’ll just accept it? So that’s what He means by having faith like a child!

It's stinkin' hot, it must be December

2009-12-05T06:04:00.000-08:00

Thanksgiving was a success! We had lots to be thankful for, and tons of great food! The piglets turned to pig-fat jelly (yum!) so we had roast chicken instead. As the only Yankees in our mission, let me pass on words of wisdom to you Northerners...If you ever get the chance to celebrate a food-involved holiday with Southerners, you should take it! Let me tell you, they know how to cook up a Thanksgiving feast!!!

This past week us ladies all got together and quilted Christmas table-runners and mantle scarves! It was my first time quilting, and actually really enjoyed myself. As a rather conservative-art soul, I did quake some at having to pick so many different patterns to be sewn together, but it turns out the earth kept revolving even with florals and plaids and stripes next to each other!

In other news, the computer crashed again (which meant we couldn't transfer money so we couldn't grocery shop) and Malawi is having a major fuel shortage (think 6-8 hour lines, violence and riots, and no guarantee of getting anything after surviving said trials!) so we can't drive anywhere. And we're moving into a 2-bedroom duplex next week, where we'll be until our permanent house opens up in January or February. We could have waited until closer to the end of the month, but why wait until the kids are out of school? This way we can celebrate Christmas without thinking about moving.

So life continues to be unpredictable and a little messy around the edges, but we are at peace in the midst of the chaos. After all, what would stressing do but add an ulcer to the list of stressors!

Holiday Spirit

2009-11-15T10:30:00.000-08:00

Holiday spirit. It’s a foreign concept for me right now. I suppose back in the US the Thanksgiving and Christmas decorations are out in full force. I imagine the evening news is full of reports about consumer spending sandwiched between desperate ad campaigns by toy and clothing and car companies. I can’t say that I miss that! But I just cannot believe that it’s half-way through November already. A friend said her sons were coming to visit soon, right before Thanksgiving. I said, “Thanksgiving? I thought you said they were coming soon”. I hadn’t looked at a calendar recently! And every day temps are in the high 90s. Sometimes it rains and we add humidity to the heat. I was not expecting this heat. (Yes, I KNOW it’s Africa! But the internet said moderate temperatures for Malawi!!!!)
The ladies in the mission all gathered to plan Thanksgiving dinner and what holiday craft we should tackle for the annual ‘women’s craft week’ in December. It’s a whole new level of culture shock to be sitting around planning menus and quilting projects! I’m responsible for chocolate cream and lemon meringue pies, and a fruit salad. Thank goodness the small turkeys here cost $53 each—I wouldn’t have a clue how to cook one since Grandpa always brought the turkey to our family dinners! Instead, a much better cook than me found 2 piglets to buy in the village, and he’s slow-smoking them for these 2 weeks so we can have something close to ham. If it were up to me, we’d have a new family tradition of honey-glazed chicken and rice for Thanksgiving—because I can cook that!
I am also responsible to bring my sewing machine to craft week so we can properly patch together the table runners we’re going to make. Yes, I have a sewing machine. Yes, it’s still in the original box, tape uncut. I scrapbook, I cross-stitch, but quilting is going to be a new one for me.
Consumerism is slowly coming to Malawi, hitting the small upper-class here in Lilongwe. One store has a few pathetic strands of tinsel up. It makes me laugh. I hear that a very skinny Malawian Santa Claus shows up at that same store in December, handing out candies to the kids. I’ll see if I can get a photo with Santa to post, because that’s got to be a riot!
Yes, holidays in Malawi are going to be different than usual. But then I was thinking, when you sift out all the extraneous things we’ve attached to the holidays, and distill things down to the true purpose, how different will they be? We’ll definitely miss our families this year, and our hearts ache over the differences they will all experience with us gone, and Grandma Mary Pumpelly gone, and Grandpa Harold steadily moving towards his passing. But we’re more aware than ever all that we have to be thankful for. We have better family time than we’ve had in years. We have a great mission family to gather with in corporate thanksgiving and praise. Jesus still came in humility and love. I guess it won’t matter if we have village piglets instead of turkey; if we decide $6 per can of cranberry sauce is worth it or not; if we down ice-cold sweet tea instead of hot mulled cider. Some things are just worth celebrating, however that may look (or taste). You all enjoy your marshmallow-topped sweet potatoes; we’ll say our thank you’s over fresh mango-pineapple-papaya fruit salad, and may God be praised for it all.

Still kickin'

2009-11-06T01:04:00.000-08:00

We’re still here, and we’re doing well! Sorry for the silence for so long—computer problems happen all over the world, it’s just harder to fix them in some places! So what’s been going on in Malawi over the last month, you ask?

Anya has been bumped up to a higher-skill swimming group (she’s a shark now, not a stingray!) and her legs are often sore but her ego is soaring since she wins most of her races. She also had a field hockey tournament where her team won both the tournament trophy and the “spirit award”. While she was in as mid-field, her team’s defenders never saw the ball (puck?) because it never got past her! She loves our new Rotweiller Jake and her pet chameleon that lives in the tree outside our window. We also had a brief relationship with a hedgehog (quite cute and only a little stinky) but we couldn’t get it to eat anything so we released it in the dog-free yard of our friends. She stayed up until 1am crying about that one!

We had a meeting with Ethan’s teacher, and discovered that he is excelling at blending consonants with vowels, counting, and telling stories…not so much at sitting still and ‘responding to correction’. We, of course, were shocked at this report (HA!). At least his teacher assures us that he is adorable and totally lovable even while he is not listening.

Isaac is crawling at lightening speed, standing for brief seconds, clapping and waving good-bye. He is amazingly skilled with his two teeth and eats absolutely everything—when he wants to and not a moment sooner. He is equally skilled at taking bites as if he’s hungry, and then spitting it out with impressive force. You can often identify all 3 meals for the day by these dried missiles on my clothes. (I’ve given up changing when things get dirty early in the day)

We’re plugging away at language, enjoying ourselves most days. We’re making slow but steady progress. Of course I did tell our guard, “Gonana bwino” instead of “Gonani bwino” the other day. Just one vowel different…no biggie right? Except that I told him to sleep WITH ME well instead of to sleep well. It might have been funny to see a Malawian blush had I not been so mortified! Does that count as making yourself a fool for Christ???

It’s hot here, and we’re anxious for the rain. There’s not a blade of grass alive in our yard, so the dust is totally out of control. Of course, once the rains start it will be mud I’ll be cursing instead! Oh well. There is nothing quite like enjoying an ice-cold Coke while baking in the sun to make you feel ready for Thanksgiving, I always say!

Health Education

2009-09-30T10:38:00.000-07:00

We traveled 3 hours north to the small town of Mzimba the last weekend of September. The Robertsons and Rudds, fellow IMB missionaries, are there doing evangelism, community development, and leadership training with 2 of Malawi’s 14 Bible schools.

Once a year the students' wives travel to the Bible schools to attend class, and this year I was invited to teach health education. I readily accepted, but I was shaking in my flip-flops before I began. How was I going to connect with semi-literate village women on matters of health and wellness!?! After working with migrant farmers in Yakima, Washington, I've been used to suggesting the inexpensive home remadies whenever available. But it's a whole new level when you're talking to people who can't afford to heat water because firewood is so expensive, or who don't always have the means to buy salt for gargling or who have never even seen a band-aid.

But God was present, and God was glorified! The 14 women were attentive, hungry for information, and open during the discussion. It did not take long for questions to turn from basic health (when gargling salt water for a sore throat, should the water be hot or cold?) to matters of discipleship (if I already have 8 children but my husband won’t allow me to use birth control, can I as a Christian woman use it without his knowledge?) I confess I was more prepared for the former than the latter, but it was wonderful to see Michelle Robertson, much more experienced than me, and the pastor’s wife guide the discussion. I left Mzimba with a new, deeper respect for the issues facing Malawian believers (especially the women) and their true desire to honor God despite the many challenges.

The greatest fan; 1925-2009

2009-09-05T02:12:00.000-07:00

I'm convinced that The Ohio State Buckeye's cheering squad will be a little quieter this year. Not that they aren't as awesome as ever (one of these days they'll pull through in the big game), or that we love our Jim Tressel any less than before. It's just that Mary Pumpelly, affectionately known as Gert to many of us, has passed away, and the loss of her voice, hoarse from yelling at the TV screen, is significant.

She will be deeply missed, for she cheered for us all as emphatically as she cheered for her Bucks. She spoiled our children, and cooked us endless meals, and made a heavenly cheesecake (as long as Jordan was there for dinner). And oh, how she prayed for us, getting us through more trials of life than we even give her credit for, despite arthritic knees!

She was godly, and she was fun--a perfectly wonderful combination. Who will ever forget the way she made the poor young airport guard blush, when, after a particularly thorough search of her titanium knees during a post-9/11 screening, she said, "Good thing I didn't have my hips replaced!"?

As much as we love her, and as much as we'll miss her, we celebrate the lessons she's taught us and we rejoice that she is now in total peace with our God. And we'll forever think of her every time we ask each other, "How 'bout them Bucks?"

Wazungu

2009-08-27T01:23:00.000-07:00

I'm used to being stared at here. There's just no way to blend in when you're in Africa! And staring doesn't seem to be rude here the way it is in the US. So I smile and wave, and then I ignore it. White people are called wazungu in Chichewa, from the word 'to turn in circles'. I've heard that is from the days of the early explorers, as they were constantly lost in the jungles and turning in circles to find due-north!

So I'm used to the staring. But the other day we stopped at the side of the road a ways out of town to let the kids climb on some rocks, and I stayed in the car to feed Isaac. Within minutes I was totally surrounded by about 25 kids, all with faces pressed up against the car windows. I was beginning to feel like an exibit at a zoo, as they started tapping on the glass, and I wondered if they were going to try to feed me, too! But it was just too much when one little girl picked up her baby sister, held her to the window, and said, "Look, a wazungu!"

First Day of School

2009-08-27T00:51:00.000-07:00

School has finally started! We're still adjusting to the schedule...for a non-morning person, it's been especially painful for me. The kids have to be there by 7:10am! Anya's teacher is from the UK, Ethan's is fresh from the US, and the kids love both of them. They're in class from 7:10 until 12:30, and then they have swimming lessons in the afternoons on Mondays and Wednesdays and Anya has a 'sports hour' on Wednesday as well. This quarter it's field hockey. I can only imagine 50 first and second graders running around whacking each other with hockey sticks, but supposedly there aren't too many fatal wounds! It's been nice to have our language session with a few less distractions, and they come home excited every day about the new friends they're making. Ethan is especially excited to finally be a "school-ager" and came home from the first day announcing, "School is actually pretty fun!" Now if only we can keep up the excitement!!!!

Trees

2009-08-12T05:23:00.001-07:00

Now there are many things in Malawi that are different than we're used to. I could post pictures of the roads, for example, in all their pot-holed glory. Or perhaps the food, with the sun-dried fish, but it would loose so much by not being able to upload the smell along with it. So instead, let me elaborate on the trees. One night in bed before we left the US, Anya began crying because she loves to climb trees and she was just sure there would be no trees in Africa. Oh ye of little faith! Just look at what she gets to play in now...huge trees, green trees, and what are those things growing in one????

Game park photos

2009-08-07T02:37:00.000-07:00

We had a wild time in Liwonde National Park. It's not quite what Kenya's parks are, but I finally got to see my first elephant! And thanks to my daring husband, I saw them plenty close! A grumpy teenage male decided he didn't care for us, and Chad taunted him just a bit by reving the engine. When the bull trumpted and charged towards us, Chad said, "Oh, don't worry. They always fake-charge at least twice before they really hit you." Now isn't that reassuring??? Anya was wailing, "Please daddy, I don't want to die today!" Oh, the joys of safari! =) But later that night as we were driving back to the lodge we stopped the car, and a herd of 9 mother and baby elephants came and surrounded us, calmly eating from the nearby plants. I didn't get a photo because I didn't want to scare them, but it was an amazing experience. It may be a no-brainer, but elephants are HUGE!!! We also saw lots of impala, waterbuck, warthogs, zebra, reedbuck, kudu, hippos, and crocs. Anyone want to come visit????

Newton's Third Law for Christians...

2009-08-07T01:39:00.001-07:00

I once read a story about a college freshman who was struggling in class and her mom finally convinced her that she should study. When she came back from the test, her mom asked how it went. She laughed and said, “It was so easy, I’ll never waste my time studying again!”

I think that’s just like me sometimes. When things are hard, I moan and complain. When God gives me the ‘answers’, I sit back and get cocky, feeling like things are easy.

Our transition here to Malawi has felt “easy” overall, but when I really consider the last few months what I see most of all is God’s grace. It has felt easy, but not because it was simple in human terms! The good-byes, the 36-hour plane trip, the shock of driving, shopping, and cooking in Africa, 40/40 challenges, the robbery, language headaches, the loss of status I’ve felt in leaving the professional world…when I look at each thing we’ve come through, I’m amazed. And yet, in all honesty, my overall feeling is that it’s been remarkably easy. So why the discrepancy? I’m convinced that what I’m seeing and experiencing more than ever before is God’s grace. That each challenge, and each difficulty, and each bad day is met by an equal and opposite dose of grace so that at the end of the week, I can look back and feel like things aren’t so hard after all.

The danger is in getting comfortable, thinking the ‘ease’ of life is due to some personal strength, or my experience as a missionary-kid, or the inherent simplicity of life uncluttered, when really it’s God’s faithfulness extended to us over and over again.

So next time I encounter a ‘test’, I hope I can come out the other side saying, “That was so easy, I’ll never waste my time trying to do it on my own again!”

A day in the life

2009-07-17T10:19:00.000-07:00

What does a day look like in Lilongwe, you ask? Let me tell you the grand adventure of life here!

The day starts at 4:50am with the call to prayer from the local mosque, who's loudspeakers are pointed right at our house, I swear. Chad gets up, and Miriam rolls over in denial, praying the kids didn't wake up (that's a 50-50). At least 3 times a week Chad gets out to run 10-12 kms (6+ miles) "just to help him wake up". Overachiever!!! My only consolation is that everyone laughs at the crazy white guy running!

The nanny arrives at 9am, so Isaac is securely tied to her back (which he loves!), the kids are banished to play outside, and we start language study. At 11am our tutor arrives, and we do more formal learning drills until 1pm when our smoke starts coming out the ears.

After we grab a bite to eat, we head out to talk to people and practice what we've just learned. I usually go up the street and talk to all the guards at each gate and Chad talks with the guys who work with us. We've made all sorts of mistakes already, but people really do enjoy laughing with us, and it hasn't felt too embarrassing.

By 3, I'm back home getting dinner ready with Musa's help. Call me spoiled, but having help is awesome! I always have him cut the onions (my least favorite job) and peel potatoes (they're so small we need like 15 for a meal!). And he makes great tortillas! Of course the payoff for this help is that I've lost all control over my kitchen, and I find things put away in the strangest places!

After dinner, we often let the kids watch a movie if we have power, or we play games. We're still working on games that work for all of us...pictionary is too hard for them, but CandyLand is getting old for us! =) Then the kids are in bed by 8pm, and we have some peace at last! With that peace, we do one of 3 things. On good days, we review our language notes and study and prepare for the next day's 'class'. On rougher days (if we have electricity) we watch a non-animated movie! On bad days, we just throw in the towel and fall into bed, praying the next day will feel easier. Thankfully, those nights are less frequent than I expected.

Somewhere in all that, we also go grocery shopping (at the 4 different stores plus the market), run errands like buy electricity (you buy units in advance!), get money (a whole other blog to explain this nightmare!) and other such adventures. All in all, we're actually enjoying our routine most days, and it will only get better once the kids get in school.

CSI-Lilongwe

2009-07-10T03:57:00.001-07:00

So this master thief used a car jack to pry apart the bars on the window, slid the glass planes out of the window (they're removable here!) and grabbed the computer which was out on the table because I had been trying to send e-mail that night. He sweetly left a whole hand-print on the wall when we reached over to unplug the computer, because the bars were so dirty. Not just a finger-print...the entire hand, fingerprint swirls visible to the naked eye! The police came by, interviewed everyone, informed us that they were unable to use the handprint, and suggested we rent out a spare room to a police officer to keep us safer (yeah, like that would make me feel better! Sometimes the police are worse than the criminals!!!!). And then they arrested our poor sleepy night-guard who said, "Officers, I know nothing. I was sound asleep!" At least he's honest. He probably doesn't even know what a computer is, how to use it, or how valuable it is on the black-market here, but they kept him in prison for 3 days (where his family had to bring him food since they don't feed you there!) "just in case". We finally asked the police to please release him since even they agreed he had not likely been the thief!

I was annoyed at all the work it's been to get a new phone and set everything up again, and grieved that all our photos since March were saved on the computer and not backed up yet. But what freaked me out is that the thieves came back again the next night!!! Our gardener-turned-guard while the other man was in prison saw them sneaking in and scared them away, but what kind of crazy thieves hit the same place twice in a row???? After that, we've 'borrowed' a very large, very black, very scary looking German Shepherd from a family who is leaving for the States for 6 months. He is much more intimidating than our little mutt puppy who was snuggling with the guard while the guys broke in! And we've had 2 guards on duty each night, and a welder is coming to reinforce all the bars so they can't be so easily pried open. But part of me is aware it's all just grasping at the illusion of control. The fact is, we are surrounded by people who routinely do not have enough to feed their family, and we stand out as rich. The kind of people that have insurance on their property so it won't really hurt us much. And they're right in some ways, aren't they?

But I also know it's not just because we're in Africa...no matter where we live, bad things can happen, and we can only do so much to prevent it. It's really all in God's hands. That's a scary truth to have to face, but it's not a bad thing to really come to grips with. We're slowly getting there, after a few sleepless nights and attempts to secure ourselves by locking every inside door too (to keep 'them' in only one room if they get in again). But really, when you have to unlock 3 doors to get to the pantry when all you want is a cup of peppermint tea to wind down after a long day, maybe you've gone too far! So the crime will go unsolved, we'll get our things replaced, and we'll get back into the swing of falling in love with Malawi. Just another week in life overseas!

Lake Malawi

2009-06-25T05:21:00.000-07:00

The word is officially in...Lake Malawi is AWESOME! Chad's mom was here for a brief 5-day visit so we managed to make it to the Lake for an afternoon. It's about 2 hours away, not too bad for a day trip. We weren't sure what it would be like, and I was afraid to get my hopes up too much. But I was speechless to think that we're so close to such a relaxing, wonderful place! There is a hotel right on the beach, and they charge to swim in their pool but use of the beach is free. The sand is soft, the surf was impressive and gave Chad a good hour on an ocean kyak trying to ride the waves, they let us use the beach chairs and umbrellas to lounge under, and they brought us freshly brewed coffee. I can not tell you how good it felt to relax and sip coffee in the sun, watching the kids play on the beach! It helps me handle the ups and downs of life just to know there IS a place we can get away to if we need. So if anyone wants to come visit... =)

Lessons learned in the first 2 months

2009-06-11T08:00:00.000-07:00

I've picked up a few pointers since we've been here. I'm not sure this will be of help to anyone else, but let me share anyway...

1. Tins of baking powder and bags of flour actually CAN get used up! I never knew that. When we left the US, I think I gave my mom the same tin of baking powder I bought 10 years ago when I got married and thought any respectable home owned the stuff. But when making rolls, biscuits, cinnamon rolls, cakes, cookies and tortillas from scratch, you actually use it!!!
2. I love debit cards. Really love them. And I miss them. I am not sure I will ever get used to using only cash. Especially when the biggest bill is worth $3.25. That means my shopping trip today, which came to 9000 Kwacha, ($60) was paid with 18 bills. We have to use fanny packs to carry a week’s worth of money, because it won’t fit in a wallet!
3. Always have at least a week’s worth of money in above-mentioned fanny pack, because you never know when you’ll be able to access the money kept most securely in the bank! I once stood in line for 40 minutes at an ATM, only to have it run out of money on the person directly in front of me (again, because it can only hold so many bills, and each one is worth so little!)
4. Plan on eating dinner at 6pm, because at least twice a week the power goes off right around 6pm, and it’s much easier to eat than to cook without power. Doughy tortillas cooked on still-warm pans are not nearly as good as they could be.
5. Always take Kool-aid and Smarties to church, to bribe the kids into silence during the 2 hour service in a foreign language with no children’s church. The dirt floor hides anything that spills.
6. Don’t save nice clothes for Sunday. Church is one of the dustiest places we go each week due to the above-mentioned dirt floors. In fact, just don’t plan on having nice clothes, period. The dust is everywhere!

I'm sure there will be more to come. We've only just begun learning our African lessons!

Relative wealth

2009-06-11T07:55:00.001-07:00

Relative deprivation: the term used for how all of us feel like we’ve got less than other people. Well, I’m having the opposite problem. I’m doggy-paddling to keep my head above the relative-wealth pool I’m in now!

Our crates arrived last week, so all Friday and Saturday we unloaded them and carried in boxes, bags, and garbage cans full of our stuff. Our house-helper, gardener, and night guard were all here to help carry things in.

As we opened the first crate, we realized it must have been dropped at some point. The book case came out in pieces. The desk was splintered in several places. Plastic containers were shattered, and the freezer door was dented so badly the seal is compromised. Our missionary friends were all so sorry for us, seeing our broken things come out one by one. I didn’t shed a tear. I was too caught up in the knowledge that our 3 Malawian helpers were carrying in more stuff than they will ever own, combined.

Every load of laundry Musa helps fold makes me aware that we wash more clothes in 1 load than he even has. When we bought new mattresses for the kids’ bunk-bed (“cheap” $23 foam pads, really), Musa admitted he was longing for a mattress because the cement floor he’s sleeping on in the apartment behind our house is getting cold at night. In the US, I was so proud of myself for being satisfied with the 99-cent brownie mixes and foregoing the fancy $3 ones. Here, I see the stack of those ‘cheap’ mixes I brought and groan over the fact that they’re each worth more than the daily wage for a general laborer. Our gardener jumped at the chance for 12 hours of OT when our guard didn’t show one night—for an extra $1.30.

So how do you handle this???? I don’t have any easy answers. I don’t think we give up all our possessions and live in abject poverty to be like those around us. I don’t think we pretend that the inequality doesn’t exist. And we can’t pay US wages here, or it would make them too dependent on us, and we won’t be here forever. We’re keeping our heads above water right now by helping where we can (we bought Musa a mattress as a “starting bonus”; we paid our guard’s mom’s $13 hospital bill he couldn’t afford) and by viewing our things as things God has given us to share. I offered to wash Musa’s clothes in the washing machine, because how can I have him wash our clothes and then watch him hand-washing his own? I share the cookies and cinnamon rolls I’m practicing making for tea-time, give them veggies that we can’t finish before they spoil, provide Ibuprofen when they have headaches.

It’s all tiny things to us, and it does little to ease my guilty feelings, but it seems to be significant to them. You should have seen Musa’s smile when we pulled his pink ‘Backstreet Boys’ comforter out of the washer, all clean and sweet-smelling! In fact, he brought us a fresh papaya as a thank you! Who can cry over a splintered bookcase screwed back together compared to that?

Photos at last!

2009-05-24T06:39:00.000-07:00

http://picasaweb.google.com/pumpellys/WeReInAfricaNow#

Click on this link and you should be able to see a slideshow of our recent photos. We'll see how this works!

Back from the Bush

2009-05-23T06:48:00.000-07:00

We're still processing all that we experienced and learned over the past month, but I wanted to let you all know we're back and we're well. There's no way to describe all that we did, but I'll do my best without boring you too much.

For 12 days or so we spent the mornings meeting with whoever would talk with us in the market-places and inner-city neighborhoods of Lusaka (the capital). We were assigned a different topic each day, (like health-and-medicine, witch-doctors, life-stage ceremonies, etc) and in teams of 2 with a translator, we just talked. Africa is like that...you can go to a neighborhood and perfect strangers have the time to sit down and talk for as long as you want! It was a great chance to "pick their brains" on how they experience life, how they think, etc. In the afternoons, we had lectures and forums from Zambian church leaders on different topics to prepare us. We rode the local transportation, ate local food in the markets, and attended local churches. We tried caterpillars (disgusting!) and whole minnow-like fish (Anya says they're great, but I chickened out, after the caterpillars were so bad!)

We then took a bus 6 hours north, where we lived in a bush-camp for 12 days (think canvas tents, long-drops, and no electricity). While there, we met with the local government officers, the village chief (the men) and his wife (the women) and spent time visiting in town (a very small town) and villages, in order to compare it to our time in the capital. We also lived with a local family for 3 days, doing exactly what they did. Many of our friends harvested peanuts, corn, or sweet-potatoes, but we ended up in the small town with a family, so we had electricity and indoor plumbing (though the water was only on for 45 minutes per day and the toilet had to be flushed with a bucket of water!).

We ended our time with 4 days at a resort back near Lusaka, where we debriefed and had language-learning lessons to prepare us for our next step of language school. So that's the detail of it all. Now for the emotion...

We had a wonderful time with all our dear friends from Virginia (there were 71 of us!) and we had a great bonding time with several of our Zambian helpers as well. Zambia is wonderful, the people are wonderful, and we were truly blessed by it all. Highlights included the chance to really see Africa through adult eyes, the exercise and sun exposure walking all over the country, and even helping to lead a former witch-doctor to Christ! Several times I had to pinch myself as I wondered if it could possibly be real. Chad also LOVED the time goofing off with the Journeymen (fresh out of college and here for 2 years).

I (Miriam) had moments of tears over the overwhelming task of carrying Isaac everywhere we went, including into the projects and villages, and washing out cloth diapers. To anyone going to 40/40 with a baby, it's worth the cost of disposables (available but expensive) to avoid daily diaper-washing. Of course, with the change in my diet, he was pooping 4 times a day!!!!! I also had to come to grips with loosening my standards of hygiene and child-supervision. The minute I sat down, someone would whisk Isaac away to show him off to their neighbors (they don't see many white babies!) and he would be gone for 20 minutes, out of sight, with perfect strangers! I just had to pray and trust, and keep smiling. I also got daily tongue-lashings from every woman under the sun for not having him in a stocking hat and booties and double-wrapped in blankets (in the 90 degree heat) because "he's cold!". How their babies survive heat-stroke, I'll never know! Again, I just smiled and let them scold me. All in all, Isaac did get two nasty colds and reverted to waking up to eat twice a night, but other than that he survived. And think of the bragging rights...he's been in 3 states, 5 countries, ridden around Lusaka in a 12-seater minibus with 18 other people (yes, sitting in my lap), and around the bush on the back of a flat-bed truck before he was 5 months old! What a life!

Now we're back in Lilongwe. Our crates have arrived (a miracle, I'm told...mission record for speed!) so we have to get them out of customs and unpack next week, and then off to language "school" to learn Chichewa. It'll be great to get a routine, to really settle in, and to figure out our city (I think I know Lusaka better than Lilongwe--I need a 40/40 here now!)

Thanks for all your prayers!

Week 2 and still trucking!

2009-04-19T08:13:00.001-07:00

We left the US 2 weeks ago today. It's hard to imagine how so much change can fit into 14 simple days! But life is good, and we're still having fun. No tummy-illnesses yet, full adjustment to the time change, and I've even cooked several meals and made a chocolate cake from scratch! I mean, that's MAJOR!

We worshiped today in a local Baptist church. The simple structure (dirt floors, plank-board benches) was surprising, but the singing was out of this world. The Malawians can sing, let me tell you! And the songs were local, not American songs translated. It was truly beautiful, and even the kids did well for the 2 hour service despite it being in Chichewa!

We leave at 6:30am on Wednesday for Zambia, where we'll have another month-long adventure completing cultural tasks in the capital and in the village. In some ways it will no doubt be challenging, but we hear good things about all that we'll learn. We return May 22nd, and then we'll fully settle in to our lives here. We're looking forward to the permanence. As Anya still says, slowly but surely it's becoming "Home sweet home!"

God's abundant blessings

2009-04-13T06:17:00.000-07:00

I wrote last week that it was time to get some keys on my poor key chain. How God loves to answer the prayers of your heart with more than you can ask or imagine! We are now in Lilongwe, moved in our own house after 10 months of transitional living. As we arrived from the airport, they handed us our own set of keys...all 21of them for the house, 2 for the gate, and 2 for the car! That's 25 keys, all different, all necessary, and no master. My key chain runneth over!

Malawi is beautiful, full of birds and tropical plants and sunshine. We're adjusted to the time-change, doing ok driving on the left side of the road, and still struggling to eat much more than peanut butter and jelly, but we'll get there.

When we got off the plane last Tuesday, Anya stood on the tarmac, turned in circles, and sighed over and over again, "Home, sweet home, sweet home!" Ethan collapsed on the ground, spread out all limbs, and sobbed, "I just can't do it anymore!" Chad and I have had moments of both in the past week, but overall, we are so overjoyed to be here, so aware that this is where we are meant to be. Thank you all for your prayers, and keep them coming. One of these days the kids are going to revolt against peanut butter, and then I'm not sure what I'll do...maybe bury myself in my pile of keys!

Leavin' on a jet plane

2009-04-04T07:30:00.000-07:00

Our bags are packed, we're ready to go... sounds like a John Denver song! We spent yesterday morning in a marathon errands circuit, hitting all the last minute stores for all the 'indispensable' things (from marshmallows and jello packets to a swimming suit for Isaac and plastic diaper covers) and we hope to not have to ever see a Walmart again for a very long time. Yesterday afternoon and evening we packed, packed and then packed some more. Everything has fit into 10 suitcases and 8 carry-ons. The dilemma now is this: do we make one of the bags overweight, pay the small fee, and carry less carry-ons through the 4 airports on 3 continents (Richmond, Chicago, London, and South Africa), or do we save money and just figure it'll all be over in 36 hours. Hmmmmmm. A wise aunt of mine once said there really are some things that are fixed by throwing money at it. I'm thinking this is one of them!

We're taking family photos with Chad's family today, eating one last time at Bob Evans (I'm gonna miss that Wildfire Chicken Salad!), and then relaxing. Tomorrow we have to get our wills and power-of-attorney notarized, and then we're off! Next posting will probably be from London!!! Can you believe it's about to really happen?

April prayer guide

2009-04-01T19:06:00.000-07:00

1 Pray for the Malawian believers, that God will fill them “with the knowledge of his will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding” (Col 1:9).
2 Thank God for the excellent training we received before leaving for the mission field, thanks to faithful and sacrificial giving to the Lottie Moon Christmas Offering every year
3 Pray for unity among the Lilongwe team as we will work together for God’s glory. Pray that we will be a blessing to the team when we arrive.
4 Pray that all our “to do” list would get done and that we would have a special last day with Chad’s family
5 Pray for the next 2 days as we travel. We leave at 2pm Yakima time for London via Chicago. Pray for meaningful good-byes. Pray also that we might sleep on the plane!
6 Pray for traveling mercies; safety during our day in London and as we leave at 7pm (11am Yakima time) for Africa. Pray for patience on our part, and good attitudes/behavior from our tired kids.
7 Praise God that our travels are over!! We arrive in Lilongwe via South Africa at 2pm local time (4am Yakima time). Pray for rapid recovery from jet-lag.
8 Praise God for our wonderful house that we can move right into. Pray that we can start feeling at home here in Lilongwe.
9 Pray for us as we adjust to eating foods that are new and scary to us. Pray that we will have true gratitude when people offer us all the food they have, no matter how different it tastes.
10 Pray that the Holy Spirit will be active around us, preparing the hearts of all those we will come in contact with, so that those who do not yet believe will turn and be saved
11 Praise God for calling us to do His work, for equipping us to do it, and for promising to go with us wherever we go. Pray that we will never forget His promises or our responsibility.
12 Praise God for the miracle of Easter as we worship our first Sunday with Malawian believers!
13 Pray for unity and healthy partnership between the local Malawian churches and us missionaries, that we can be a blessing to each other and work together to spread the gospel
14 Pray for the director and the teachers of the Baptist Theological Seminary of Malawi: for discernment in course content, godly mentoring relationships with the students, for their own walks with the Lord
15 Thank God for the seminary students: their commitment to higher education, their passion for reaching their villages for Christ, and the support of their families and congregations
16 Pray for the persecuted Christians all around the world: for safety, strength, a persevering witness, and joy in the face of opposition (see Acts 5:41).
17 Pray for Mussa (Moo-sa), our Muslim guard. Please ask that his heart would be softened to the gospel, and that we would be a witness to him in word and deed.
18 Pray for Isaac: for continued good health and development (especially since he is too young for the immunizations that help keep the rest of us safe), and good sleep patterns.
19 Thank God for the ability to study the language of Malawi (Chewa). Pray for Chad and Miriam that our minds and tongues would be blessed to learn this language quickly and well so that we can communicate in their “heart language”
20 Pray for the Seminary students: for financial means to pay the fees, for the stress it places on the family, for the ability to focus, retain, and implement what they’re learning
21 Pray for the thousands suffering from the effects of HIV/AIDS in Malawi: those with the disease and those who have lost loved ones
22 Praise God for the chance to go to Zambia today and be reunited with all the Africa missionaries we met during the Virginia orientation; pray for the next month as we undergo “survivor Africa” orientation now!
23 Pray for Ethan: for the ability to express his emotions during our transition, bravery in meeting and talking to new people, and ability/willingness to respect the new culture’s rules
24 Pray that we will walk so closely in-tune with the Spirit’s leadership that we will not miss any opportunity to share His Good News.
25 Praise God for the opportunities He is bringing us through this African orientation. Pray that we would learn well, respect well, and see fruit for His glory.
26 Pray for Anya, that she continues to grow in obedience, a gentle spirit, and grace.
27 Pray that we would protect our time for personal devotions, despite a busy schedule. Pray that every day we would grow deeper in our knowledge and love of Him.
28 Pray for boldness and intentionality in looking for those who need to hear the gospel message
29 Thank God that we have the victory against Satan in the spiritual warfare battle. Pray that we will be mindful of this victory when we encounter things meant to discourage us.
30 Pray for our family unity: for patience and abounding grace, for a strengthening of our relationships, for deepening respect and appreciation for each other

Five days to go

2009-03-31T15:30:00.000-07:00

We're down to the wire. We have two suitcases packed, and piles of clothes, diapers, and bottles of Advil, bug spray, and sun screen scattered all over. It looks as though a Walmart vomited in our room!!! And I'm excited, and I'm in shock. Every time I pack a cloth diaper, my stomach does a flip-flop. I'm not sure why the cloth diapers hold so much power over my psyche. I used cloth for Anya, my first, here in the US. It could be because I also tried to use cloth for my second, and it only lasted 3 weeks before I collapsed in fatigue and overwhelmed-ness (is that a word?).

It also could be that those soft, white innocent diapers represent all the ways that life in Africa will be more challenging. Cooking from scratch, for example, as in no seasoning packets or cans of beans. How on earth is my family going to survive if I have to think ahead enough to soak beans for 24 hours before I can make chili??? It should be an interesting first month of cooking again. I foresee lots of peanut butter sandwiches!

But truth be known, I also feel lots of excitement. What an opportunity, living overseas, raising my children to understand global issues, meeting people from all over. I was going through my purse the other day and found my key-chain. It's a simple key-chain; a piece of mahogany with my name carved in it, given to me in high-school by a shopkeeper on the Mombasa coast. It's been empty for the last 4 months. No car keys. No house keys. No work keys. It's time to fill it back up again, I say. Time to get back into real grown-up life again, even if that means cloth diapers and soaking beans!

Ending well

2009-03-16T11:31:00.000-07:00

No creative juices are flowing today, sorry! We're winding down our time in orientation now, with just over a week to go. The final commissioning service is next Wednesday the 26th, and then we're done. Our tickets are booked, leaving Richmond for Malawi (via Chicago, then London, then Johannesburg) on April 5th, arriving on April 7th. Our first Sunday in Africa will be Easter. There's something sweet about that...new life celebrated in our new life.

We're anxious to get out there, and we're sobered as we think of the final good-byes, the changes, the stresses we'll no-doubt go through. Pray for us, that we will finish this 'race' of Orientation well, finish the 'race' of our American lives well, and that we would start our new Malawian 'race' with energy, zeal, and excitement; all while running the 'good race' in our public and in our private lives, for His name's sake.

Porcine etymology

2009-02-28T12:13:00.000-08:00

We had the lecture on Culture Shock and transition on Friday. A lot of it was familiar, since Chad and I both remember well the adjustment back to the US in college. But they warned us that we had likely gone through some degree of culture shock in adjusting to orientation. That made me think back. Hmmmmm. Is that why I wanted to stay in our small apartment for the first couple days, rather than venture out to meet new people? Is that why I can't drop the baby weight? Must be!!!!

It also made me think about the kids. They've done SO well adjusting, but there have been minor bumps in the road now and then. Perhaps they did go through a minor culture shock. Trouble falling asleep. Increased shyness and independent playing. Unusual questions...wait. That isn't part of culture shock, is it? Well, it wasn't part of the lecture, but let me share one event, and you be the judge. As Ethan was struggling to go to bed a few weeks ago, he looked up at me with big green eyes filled with tears. With all sympathy, I asked, "Honey, what's wrong?". The tears spilled over, and he sobbed in the most plaintive voice ever, "But mom, why do they call pigs 'pigs'????"

I honestly don't know why pigs are called pigs. If anyone has an answer, I'd love to pass it on to my poor troubled son. In the mean time, I think I'll read an article on helping kids adjust to culture shock.

Half way through

2009-02-20T15:04:00.000-08:00

We've just completed week 4 of 8 in our training schedule. At times I think that 4 more weeks seems like so long, and in the same moment I can't believe it's only 6 weeks until we'll land in Africa! Things are going very well, and they seem easier almost every day. Isaac is in a good routine of waking up only once during the night, with one all-nighter about once a week. Anya and Ethan are in a great routine of going to school, and they love their teachers and their new friends. And the really great thing is that their closest friends are going to Africa too, so we'll be with them again for our quasi-"Man vs Wild" African orientation in Zambia (called 40/40)! That's an answer to one of my most fervent prayers.

We've had some great times. Ethan survived sucking up peas through his penne pasta WITHOUT having to do the himlich, though it was close. Chad and the kids had an awesome jam session with Africa drums, singing about the snakes at 40/40. Chad has several girls trained to bow down when he enters the room "becuase he is the chief" (add your own african accent). So all in all, we're loving this time.

Ethan's teacher has been doing an amazing job of documenting their days, and each week I get photos of him. Last week they learned all about emotions...something we've all been learning a lot about over the last 6 weeks! I've taken several pictures myself, but I can't find the cord to upload them at the moment, so I'm going to let Ethan speak for us all. We've had ups and downs, but life is good, and more importantly, God is good, whether we're feeling lonely, sad, or excited!

Christian Community

2009-02-08T12:44:00.000-08:00

When we realized we'd be at FPO with Isaac as an infant, I was quite upset. I knew how hard it would be. I comforted myself by saying (almost daily) "Well, Miriam. At least you won't have to cook" and "I'm sure there will be lots of people willing to help". It calmed my spirit, but I don't know how much I believed myself. Plus, I'm not good at asking for help.

There is no doubt having kids makes this process harder. I sometimes look with envy at the couples enjoying their time, being carefree and socializing with others, and then us parents are tired-looking, with no energy left for socializing after the kids fall asleep. But it turns out I was right about people wanting to help out! This place is amazing.

Yesterday during dinner, one new friend insisted on holding Isaac while we ate. When she had to leave before we were done, another woman we hadn't even officially met yet came over and asked if she could hold him for us. We sat and visited for half-an-hour after we were done eating, Isaac content in her arms and us enjoying the respite. Then today, our quad-mates announced they were going to be the grandparents for the day, and they set up play-dough and cookie making stations. For 2 hours, they braved the 6 kids ranging in age from 8 weeks to 10 years and gave us parents time to do whatever we needed (Chad played Ultimate Frisbee with the guys...I'm on the computer!) What a blessing!!! And this is happening all over the 'campus'. There's a committee for "Children's Ministry" and they hold an open gym for 1.5 hours twice a week where kids can be dropped off to play. There's a sign-up sheet where anyone available for babysitting writes their numbers down to help out the parents when needed. Everywhere around us, people are meeting each others' needs.

And isn't that what Christian Community is supposed to be about? We're studying Acts right now, and it says so many times that the believers took care of one another as needs arose. It's an amazing experience to be on the receiving end of that, and to be part of the giving of blessings as well. It's making this 8 weeks even richer, and inspiring me to be alert for ways I can bless others. After all, "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." John 13:34-35

Field Personel Orientation (FPO)

2009-01-29T18:30:00.000-08:00

Wow! They weren't kidding when they told us to "expect intense!" We're two days into an 8-week FPO and I'm exhausted. Yet it's an amazing experience at the same time...funny how often God works with that dichotomy. We're being stretched spiritually, pushed into more reflection, prayer, and focus than we've had time to do before, and being held accountable for growth at every turn. I want to cry, and then I'm deeply grateful, and then I want to rebel all in a whirlwind cycle of emotions every minute or so!

We've been on this campus before, and we had awesome times visiting and sharing until all hours of the night. Of course, that was without kids. I'm finding it much more difficult with the three little ones. Anya and Ethan love their teachers and their new class-mates and are so excited to have friends again, but they're showing some signs of stress too. Not eating the food, resisting bed-time, ignoring rules, bickering. Nothing the other 100+ kids aren't doing too, but tiring all the same. Isaac is back to full health, but has decided a good bedtime would be midnight as well as eating at least once in the middle of the night (3am seems to be his preference). It's also very exhausting for me to run back and forth trying to focus during class and then feeding him every 2.5-3 hours. I'm missing a lot, and I'm always on the go...feeding during lunch and missing the breaks and the times when everyone else is visiting and debriefing. When I do have a moment of down-time, I'm having trouble focusing on prayer or meditation because I'm so tired I fall asleep.

But our tiny living area seems HUGE compared to our families' spare rooms for the last 2 months (as much as we loved being with them!). We have our own washer and dryer, and we eat in the cafeteria so I don't have to cook a single meal (of course, imagine trying to herd 250 people (half of them kids!) through a cafeteria line without dropping a tray or stepping on a small child...I'm really ready for a nap by the time we sit down with our food!) We have accountability partners praying for us, a team of prayer-walkers on campus every day praying for us, and a whole lot of people going through the exact same emotions at the exact same time. There's no doubt that it's hard, but I am convinced 99% of the time that I wouldn't trade this time and experience for anything. Just keep praying for the 1% when I want to run away screaming and crying!

First-day jitters

2009-01-25T17:01:00.000-08:00

Well, for the last 8 months, we've been anxiously awaiting training, the final step before getting to the field. More than once I was sure it would never come. Then we arrived in Virginia and it seemed to actually be within our grasp. Then Isaac got sick, and at 4am in the hospital with no chance of sleep, I imagined all sorts of reasons we would be held out of this training for another 3 months. But Isaac is a trooper and he's doing great, weight holding steady and starting to climb again, cold symptoms almost totally gone. And here we are, the day before we move our things over to the facility just outside of Richmond. Classes don't actually start until Wednesday, but it feels like the day before boarding school. Tomorrow we learn where our "quad" is (apartment-like place we'll call home for the next 8 weeks), and might even meet our house-mates! We'll have private bed-rooms and a bathroom, but shared living room with 3 other couples or families. We're praying for playmates for the kids, while also praying for the poor singles who might get placed with our wild family! We'll let the kids tour their classrooms and the cafeteria, discover the playground, and pick up our first assignments. And after all the longing...I'm quite nervous!

I wonder how we'll possibly get us all up, ready and to breakfast in time for 8:30 classes. I wonder how I'll function with Isaac still waking up every 3-4 hours every night, and how to manage not waking up everyone else in the quad. How will nursing him work during the day, when I'm supposed to be in class? How loudly are the kids going to scream when they discover they have to have 5 or so more shots? Will they make goods friends? Will we make good friends???

But if there's one thing I've learned in life, it's that there's no point developing ulcers over questions life will answer soon enough. So I'll keep wondering, and tomorrow I'll drown my jitters in a good cup of African coffee, and I bet I'll have some answers for you next time I write.

Prayer Request

2009-01-17T13:41:00.000-08:00

Isaac's "first cold" which started on Tuesday turned worse on Friday. His new pediatrician was able to get us in, and warned us to keep a very close eye on him, given his young age and his severe congestion. At 3am this morning we had to go to the ER because of his respiratory distress. Almost 5 hours later they discharged us with the diagnosis of RSV, a common upper respiratory infection that is notorious for causing trouble in young babies. In fact, the ER doc described it as "a cold from hell." That may, indeed, be what what we're dealing with. After all, at this point in our journey, we anticipate a step-up in spiritual warfare. What better way to distract us than with a sick baby and no sleep???

Isaac has been doing much better this afternoon, and through it all has remained so preciously sweet-spirited. We pray tonight goes well. There are no treatments for RSV other than "tincture of time," prayer, and watchful waiting. We appreciate all of your prayers through the next few days, weeks and months, as Isaac recovers and then as we face whatever else the devil comes up with.

Goodbye Pacific Northwest, Hello Virginia

2009-01-16T14:28:00.000-08:00

We made it to frigid Virginia, where we're staying warm against 0 degree weather (what's with this winter???) and recovering from a trying trans-continental flight. I won't mention the airline, but I'm quite convinced they were 'United' against us the whole way! =) First, imagine trying to check in 10 50-lb bags, 3 car seats, and a stroller while also managing 5 carry-ons and the 3 kids... at the check-in kiosk where we had to do the work ourselves, then pay for each piece of luggage (despite being within our weight and bag allowance!) and then carrying them all over for x-ray screening, all while being scolded for blocking the 2-way traffic with our things. Sigh.

Then we were told at the security gate that we were specially selected for "some extra attention and assistance". Great, we thought. We could use it!!! Little did we know what that really meant is we were selected for full security screening, with pat-downs, some bizarre puffer machine that felt like it was going to blow our clothes right off us, and detailed searching of each of the carry-ons. Thank goodness we got to the airport 3 hours early!

I thought things were looking up when the only coffee shop past security DID have the sprinkle doughnuts I had promised the kids in exchange for good behavior (I had thought there was a bakery where we could eat, but it was on the other side of security, and I wasn't about to go back through!). But then the airlines again mounted an offense against us, and denied us early boarding. The man actually said, "We don't pre-board children here" and sent us all away. Annoying! And then they had the audacity to repeatedly complain over the PA system that too many of us were standing in the isle and blocking traffic, trying to get our kids, our bags, and ourselves stowed. And Isaac, while he was SO good and pleasant despite his first cold, had 2 diaper blow-outs, and the planes had no changing tables. The poor business man who got stuck beside us as we struggled through clean-up balancing it all on our laps!

But then again, we managed 3 kids on 2 flights with no tears (from them or from us!), Isaac had no trouble with the air pressure changes, all 13 of our checked items arrived, and we had only a 20 minute delay in Chicago despite our plane having mechanical difficulties (being Chicago, they had another plane sitting around for us to use!). We're enjoying Chad's family, and they're loving on the grand kids. So I guess there isn't that much to complain about after all. Plus, we have a whole 2 1/2 months to recover before we do it all again!

Adjustments to Being Five

2009-01-08T12:19:00.000-08:00

Isaac is 4 weeks old today, a fact I can hardly believe. As a whole, we've all adjusted very well to what I feared could have been quite rough. Granted, we've only just begun a year full of changes, but so far adjusting to 3 kids has been much easier than going from 1 to 2.

Some examples of our success: Isaac is already up to 10 pounds. Might we actually end up with a normal-sized kid? Nursing has finally become easy, and we haven't had to supplement with formula or use a pacifier at all. Perhaps that's why he's 10 pounds! Anya and Ethan haven't shown any sign of jealousy or frustration with their brother, despite how much of my time he takes up. Ethan insists on giving him a morning kiss, a lunch-time kiss, a "nursing-time" kiss, and on and on. We are getting enough sleep to be functional and pleasant (most of the time!), despite the fact that 8 hours of broken sleep are DEFINATELY not the same as 8 straight hours. Probably not even the same as 6 stright hours, if you ask me!

The kids have made some great observations, as only kids can do. Here are some of our favorites:

1. The day Isaac was born, Ethan found a pink infant's hat on the hospital floor. He asked if we could bring it home for his baby sister. When reminded that he doesn't have a baby sister, he said with a smirk, "Not yet, I don't".

2. When Anya was asked what her first thoughts about Isaac were, she said, "Wow. He has a banana-head"

3. When asked how he liked being a big brother, Ethan said, "It's great. I'm almost going to be 29 years old now" (Why 29???)

4. One day when Ethan was running crazy, I asked him if Isaac was going to be as wild as he is. Ethan laughed and said, "No, he's just going to eat, sleep, and poop right now. But when he gets older, he'll watch me and learn!" Oh joy!!!

All in all, though there have been tears and moments of being overwhelmed, we're doing great, having fun, and are all totally in love with our new family.

Isaac Allen Pumpelly

2008-12-13T16:09:00.001-08:00